by Bob Holt

Created on: January 01, 2009

Owning a home is harder than it's been in years due to today's economy. Foreclosures and high unemployment rates have turned the longtime American dream into a nightmare.

But that doesn't mean owning your own home is impossible. You just need to have a solid game plan in mind before you visit a realtor's office. And then crumple it up and throw it out when you get there.

You remember back when you were young and in love. You said you'd live in a cardboard box with her if that's what it took to be together.

And you've grown accustomed to the cardboard box, because that's all you have remaining from the divorce settlement.

Be that as it may, buying a new home is a happy time. It means that you're having a fresh start in your life, a new beginning. But with a new home comes fresh new responsibilities.

One is home upkeep. You'll find that the grass on your lawn does not magically disappear after in reaches a certain height. You will actually need to mow it. You can't let your idiot neighbor's yard look better than yours, unless he buys you enough beer that you both agree to keep the lawns looking equally bad.

A good rule of thumb to use here would be to cut your grass when it reaches either six feet high, or the height of the hammock you will strategically install between your two backyard trees.

Location is another important consideration. Chances are the location of your new home is not the best if the grammar school your children will be attending is located next to a Hooters.

Here in New Jersey, state law requires that Dunkin Donuts slash Baskin Robbins franchises are separated by no more than two blocks. And you will need to live close to a supermarket which enforces the ten items in the express lane rule strictly. By use of a taser.

You might also want to look over your immediate neighborhood before you decide to move there. If the local little children have happy hour at their lemonade stands, it tends to affect future property values.

And if your standard eighth grade student needs a shave and has a varsity letter in cockfighting, you might need to look elsewhere.

After you've decided upon your location comes the move itself. The moving process is an integral part of the success you will have in your new home. Moving is the second most enjoyable job you will face in your home buying experience, coming right after sticking needles underneath your fingernails.

Many wise people will devise a plan before they move, like organizing their possessions in boxes to form some

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