by David Puckett

Created on: December 31, 2008   Last Updated: April 02, 2010

Which type of divorce is right for any individual or couple is, of course, as individual as the 60 million or so married people in the U.S. Anyone who finds themselves at the point of considering the legal procedure of Divorce should first and foremost find themselves at a highest moment of clarity. There are so many important issues at play in a Divorce and should never be entered into as lightly as some marriages are. What follows are the wisdoms gained by a two time veteran who may be able to get a rookie's mind right about what will become a defining moment in the rest of their life.

First wisdom I wish to impart is also the most important. Always know and never loose sight of the fact that a divorce is a legal procedure that just like a business decision should have absolutely nothing to do with emotions. Emotions will be of no use to you on this road of untying the nuptial knot. On the same side of that coin, do not confuse emotion with instinct. Make sure your decisions are made with your ultimate goals in mind.

Ultimate goals bring me to the second Wisdom. You need to make a short list of your closest and most respected advisors. This group should include those who you feel you know best and know you best. They also need to be people who you believe will be giving you their honest opinions and not a lot of what they think you will want to hear. If at all possible, let one or two of these counselors be your parents. Lying somewhere in a corner next to your emotions should be your pride. Convene this group of advisors and work through the first order of business, which should be whether or not you have ruled all forms of reconciliation. Once you are sure that Divorce is the only path you must follow, the next step is to work on getting representation.

Networking is the first rule of thumb. Get contacts of prospective attorneys from recommendations from inside your star chamber of advisors. If this yields nothing, try getting recommendations from web sites like Find Law for lawyers in your area. Do not let it be the case that you spent more time and energy investigating halls for the reception than you spend looking for your attorney. A good rule to follow when interviewing attorneys is to ask them how many cases they have done in the specific courthouse you will be filing in. Don't let them get away with an answer like "I do a lot of work there" you are looking for their best estimate in numbers. The more time they have spent in that venue will make them

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