by Tee Wimer

Created on: December 31, 2008   Last Updated: February 09, 2010

My "Forever" Friend is no longer Forever....I miss her more each and everyday.

As I sit and think of the people in my life that has come and gone and those that remain present it makes me sad. We all have friends that come and go.

We have all had those we called our "Best Friends" we grew up with them through our school years. Many grow apart from those we once knew. As we move forward in our lives we make new friends; which reminds me of a song I learned in girl scouts many years ago; "Make new friends, but keep the old ones. One is silver and the others gold.".

I'd moved out of my home town in 1990 and I had found a job and that is when I met Amy . She was new to the area as well. She was from Buffalo, NY and I was from Philadelphia, PA. After getting to know her and finding out we had so much in common, we seriously felt like sisters. We were "Forever Friends" or so I thought. It was amazing the bond we had. We leaned on each other and helped each other through so much.

After my divorce in 2002, I moved back near my hometown. She had been having an affair and a year later she divorced and moved here to. Things changed at least I felt they had. The friendship went down hill from there. She found a job and to everyone she met she acted like a victim. Everyone felt sorry for Amy and all that her ex supposedly did to her and the fact that she was a struggling divorced Mom. She spoke horrible of her ex and I was the only one who knew the truth.

In all reality I should have overlooked it and taken the truth to my grave. It bothered me more each time she said anything or each time I heard someone feeling sorry for her. I just couldn't take it anymore. She was at fault and she'd done things really wrong and totally against my beliefs. I couldn't stand watching it or hearing anymore. I know it was wrong and I should have confronted her instead of voicing what I'd known. It hurt her very bad. I was not a good friend at that time for I should have never told anyone the deep dark secrets that she'd shared with only me, her "Forever Friend". But, I did it and I do regret it each and every day and I can't take it back. This is a regret I will live with for the rest of my life. I should have taken the secret to my grave and probably could have if I not witnessed the victimized act she was presenting each and every day. I wish so badly that I would never have spoken a word.

I know I will never bond with anyone else ever again like I did with her. We had a bond like no other. It was amazing. I think of her so often and knowing she is right here in the same town but we never speak it's so hard. She checks out my website and I check out hers but we never invite each other to our friends list. I know it is crazy. I know in my heart that she misses me too. There are times when I see something, or hear something that totally takes me back to a time that we had and it makes me miss her even more. I should have never voiced anything when she was going through her victimized state of mind. I should have confronted her but I didn't.

Of course there are others in my life that are just wonderful good people but those friendships will never replace the friendship I once had with Amy. I suppose, some things are not meant to be "Forever".

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