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So, what happens after Cinderella is whisked away by the handsome prince? She lives "happily ever after", of course, but what does that mean? Clearly, this is not a case where the handsome prince eventually squanders away his inheritance on a gambling addiction and declares bankruptcy less than a decade later, leaving his wife and children hungry and bitter. No, fairy tales are chock-full-o happy endings that are left to the imagination.No one tells you how these lucky characters end up having such happy forever-afters. Happy marriages are thus an enigmatic ideal for which we are left pining, but about which we are completely uninstructed. Our imaginations fill the gaps with Cinderella experiencing endless romantic days being warmly embraced by her eternally handsome husband. And we, the desperate humans that we are, wait and wait for our wedding day, for the chance to wear the perfect white gown, to eat that 5-layer vanilla cake, to be the center of attention and the envy of all our friends, because we actually believe we will live happily ever after once we belong to someone.

Though the beginning of marriage is a time of ecstasy, of exploring the newness of your title and place in the world as a "husband" or "wife", eventually (and this is what no one ever talks about), life does happen as it did before you were married. The trash needs to be taken out, the project at work needs to be completed, the bills need to be paid, the coworker or friend criticizes you, the car needs to be sold. Then enter the greater challenges of life: the cat passes away, the family member dies, you have a miscarriage. And then enter one of the greatest challenges any marriage will face: parenthood. Nights are often sleepless, meals become rushed, and conversations start revolving around potty training and Elmo.

The truth is, the romantic ecstasy shifts. It is real and beautiful for a time, but it is temporary. It, like everything in life, changes. Many people refuse to accept that married life eventually becomes un-dramatic and mundane. And the moment we no longer feel those pangs of excitement, we think that we are no longer in love, that our spouse has changed for the worst, that the marriage must be doomed.

So, how can we all be like Cinderella and live happily ever after? Perhaps it is by understanding and accepting that romance, like our bodies and possessions, changes forms. Maybe romance and marital bliss can be discovered in the minute details of life- in daily conversations over morning coffee, in weekend walks in the woods, in the fact that he scoops the litter or she makes the lasagna, in the way you mutually love your child (or dog), in the way you accept and make fun of each other's idiosyncrasies, in the way you forgive each other for the seemingly unforgivable.

Maybe it is possible that Cinderella did live happily ever after. Perhaps she accepted that the romantic ecstasy she once felt would be forever-changing, and that marital bliss is simply feeling love in the midst of the ordinary normalcy of everyday life with a best friend.

Learn more about this author, Anitra Lahiri.
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