by Margaret Jamal

Created on: December 29, 2008   Last Updated: November 03, 2010

Did you know that many people who experience "Post-Holiday Blues" attribute it to feelings of loneliness? Holidays tend to mask and then amplify feelings of loneliness.

Additionally, the tendency to overindulge during the holidays also produces feelings of regret. As we punish ourselves with self loathing the isolation that follows, enhances the post-holiday blues even more. Holidays remind us of the power of community and how lonely we are when we are deprived of it. While we can get caught up in the fun, once the fun is over, we are left with a feeling of "now what do I do with myself?" This article does not address how to never experience post-holiday blues or loneliness that might cause it , but only how to move beyond it.

1)
We have to first admit that our holiday blues is in fact due to feeling lonely. This is difficult perhaps because the world celebrates and encourages popularity. Many people feel that lonely people are also unwanted and are uncomfortable with that possibility. But loneliness is not about others as much as it is about the one who feels lonely.

2)
Take the time to list the reasons that you feel lonely. What I found is that often when we try to list the reasons that we think that we feel lonely we uncover other issues. For me, I realized that I was still grieving the loss of my mother. Holiday celebrations just seemed incomplete without her.

3)
Look at your list and for each item and write down one thing that you can do to make that issue go away. For example, I realized that I needed to find grief counseling and support to address how much I was hurt from losing my mother. Taking the steps to do something about what bothers you is a great move towards overcoming it.

4)
Now list everything that is good about you. This is often difficult when feeling lonely because many lonely people also fail to see their own value. That you are still alive is the first place to start. Maybe you have a great smile, a love for animals, a green thumb, like to write, etc. Don't be shy about writing good things about yourself.

5)
Give thanks for how wonderfully you are made. You should realize that your uniqueness is a precious gift to the world.

6)
Now list at least 3 people that you know personally, appreciate and care about.

7)
Think about and make a list of all the things that you believe are good about them. It is wonderful that you have the ability to see the good in others. Many people are so sorry for themselves that they cannot find the good in others.

8)
Give thanks for these people being in your life. They are a blessing to you and probably care for you also. People tend to feel when they are cared about and appreciated. As they feel this they often return the sentiment it in their own way.

9)
Write down what you would like to do to help others who might have post holiday blues due to feeling lonely. Thinking about others is a great way to take the focus off your own issues.

10)
Make plans to act on what you have in your list to help others overcome their loneliness. You will find that in trying to help others, you will also help yourself. You will not have to look far to find people who could use this help.

With these tips you may discover that you simply do not have the heart or the time to entertain the Post-Holiday Blues.

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