by G E Barr

Created on: December 23, 2008

GUILTY VICTIMS

Victims of sexual abuse are not only subject to more scrutiny and skepticism they are also socially tagged as a problem. In some families, the victim is silenced so as not to bring shame upon the family, or perhaps the family just doesn't want to deal with all the facets of court and psychology workers. Unfortunately, those who will silence victims are women. Many times the victim is deemed "mentally ill" or "troubled" or just plain old "bad". Communities play along with this all the time.

Imagine, if you will, that a police officer goes to work. During the commission of a crime, he is notified and dispatched to the crime. He shows up and does all that he can to reason with a man with a gun. The man is intent on getting away with robbing a grocery store. The man shoots the police officer and flees. The next day, charges are filed against the owner of the store, because the robber was a frequent and known customer. The police officer is also charged for angering the robber and "causing" him to shoot and flee.

You asked for it. You caused it. You ain't no better than he is.

This mentality stems from 2 points of view. First, people lie. To think for one moment that women won't lie, is to be a damned fool. Women lie, just like men do. Second, men and women don't always see sexual abuse as a "crime", or they want to protect the accused.

I personally cannot understand why a woman would cry rape when that is not what occurred. Unless she's mentally ill or the whole scenario is a "scheme" or conspiracy. And that too can happen.

On the other hand, one of the first things some guilty men proclaim, is oddly enough, that the woman is "crazy". Yes, that's right. If she's distraught (and rightly so), then a community who ignores her or goes out of its way to make her feel uncomfortable, chances are she might even act a little crazy. Therefore, she's crazy, and he's just a victim.

Once a rape has occurred, it is a little late for precautious behavior and I do not know of any way to deal with the insanity of society. I do not believe in rape. I do not believe that anybody "asks" for it. But the best way to avoid this crime is to think ahead. Do your best to not be put in a questionable position. Don't be too trusting. And realize, there are women who will conspire with a rapist. They can be social workers, therapists, doctors, judges or teachers. They'll lie when the truth would fit better.

That's what incest has done for our society and it is a little late in the day to do anything about it. Unless you want to get radical. At which time you can bet on becoming the new Extremist.

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