by Richard Para

Created on: December 23, 2008   Last Updated: December 04, 2009

Is it impolite to sell something you received as a gift?

This question, is it impolite to sell a gift, has many levels to it and just may be far more complicated than it may appear. A quick response to the question at hand is...no, it is absolutely within your prerogative to do with your gift as you see fit, however, my response comes with a large box filled with caveats attached to it. First, let's look at this question from the point of view of the gift receiver.

How much emotion do you think, as the gift receiver, the giver has attached to the gift, is that gift giver "in love" with said gift; the more the emotional investment the giver has in the gift the deeper will be the pain if it comes to light that you sold the gift. Of course there is your relationship with the gift giver to consider, naturally the closer the bond the more the pain will be. The monetary value must also play a role in this drama, as would be the case in receiving a gaudy, overly pretentious diamond broach; it may be butt-ugly but it is, after all, a diamond. Now consider, was this gift receiving event part of a reciprocal event as in Christmas, Hanukkah etc.; the pain is then diminished due to the fact that the giver can then dispose of the gift you had given as a tit-for-tat response. Finally, in your estimation, how much thought was given toward the purchase of that gift, was the giver really thinking of you; or, was he/she thinking of themselves, as in the case of a Christmas fruitcake as a gift. The giver cannot be thinking of the receiver, nobody eats a Christmas fruitcake, doorstop maybe but, as for consumption, even little Fluffy wouldn't come near it. So much for the receiver of the gift, what about the giver?

If you know a person well enough to present them with a gift it follows that you should know them well enough to know the kind of gift that would appeal to them, there is a clear responsibility on your part to put effort in the gift selection process because if you don't you are left with no emotional recourse when your gift ends up on eBay. Think about the giver who gives the what's-yours-is-mine gift: an example would be the incident involving my friend Butch. Butch loves cigars, everybody knows that Butch loves cigars, a gift for Butch should be a no-brainer and yet for his birthday Butch's wife gave him two tickets for "Mickey Mouse on Ice".

In my humble opinion, of the two entities involved in any gift giving event the onus clearly falls on the back of the giver, like it or not, the gift receiver would never wish to sell a gift that truly delights him/her. A gift given without proper thought is not a gift but an insult. When in doubt ask, discreetly of course, when in doubt there is always the gift card, who among us does not enjoy a gift card? Forget the Unicorn-on-velvet painting!

In the end, when consideration is given to all the factors involved in any gift giving ritual I must reiterate my stance and shout a loud NO to the question: Is it impolite to sell something you received as a gift?

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