by Kandice Day

Created on: December 22, 2008   Last Updated: January 19, 2009

She had to go, you know, but didn't want to deal with the stares when she entered the restroom. They always stared, judging her intentions. All she ever had to do was take care of business, but all they ever wanted to know was what was on her mind. Their stares cut through her soul like dagers.

Walking down the street with her friends, the birthday celebration couldn't have been going any better. Laughing and stumbling down the sidewalk, surrounded by hundreds of other college kids entertaining a Saturday night, she heard it. It wasn't the first time tonight, but on this occasion the word was spoken by two large black men. Did they not understand that by judging her, they were no better than those that judged them throughout history?

She was use to it on most occasions, but tonight was her birthday. It was suppose to be judgment free. She was suppose to hold her fianc's hand in pride and happiness, and not care what anyone else thought.

Why do people judge anyone? We are all human, all sinners, and all the same. One of the most vain and futile ways to waste away your energy is to judge another. How does the saying go? "Yet he who is without sin cast the first stone."

I implore you to show me a man who has not sinned, while I have seen millions cast more than a few stones. We toss stones at each other before we even realize we're doing it, it's become so natural.

There have been many communities of people who have faced a barrage of stones, primarily due to three things; race, religion, and sexual orientation. For reasons beyond my understanding, these are the traits that attract the largest boulders.

The roots of judgment towards homosexuals are based in the Bible, or so they would have you think. Perhaps it is because of this perceived acceptable biblical judgment that people today feel safe throwing stones. Perhaps it is because of their own personal imperfections, or their own dark fears, that lead them to judge. Whatever the reason, no one has the right to place themselves on a higher pedestal then their fellow man.

Judgment comes from a dark place, whether it's fear, anger, or jealousy. These are emotions that we are embarrassed to have, and so we project them onto others. By our fear of the unknown, we project our disapproval. By our anger at going against the grain, we project our disgust. And by our jealousy of another's happiness, we project our distain. These are all irrational emotions, clouded by the idea of what our perfect world would be (boring) and what reality is.

Judgment is based in ignorance and sloth. In our unwillingness to educate ourselves, to learn both sides of every story, we are failing our communities. In our unwillingness to own our mistakes and our fears we fail ourselves.

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