by John McDevitt

Created on: December 21, 2008

Food is no substitute for a big hug. Fast forward fifteen years to the image of a confused, obese teenager, sitting alone hugging a huge bag of chips for comfort and company. It can happen when parents substitute food for love.

Strong emotions and food don't mix. Fighting and forcing your toddler to eat new, unfamiliar food is the flip side of using food as reward and comfort. Neither work and both develop unhealthy attitudes that can warp a child's eating habits for life.

Toddlers are learning machines. Everything they see, hear, feel, touch and taste plunges them into a new adventure. Eating is no exception. They'll carry the eating habits and food attitudes they learn as toddlers throughout their lives.

Food should be used to ease hunger and nourish the body, not the emotions. Give an upset toddler a treat to calm them or rail at them because they refuse food they 'should' eat and they're likely to develop an unhealthy emotional association with those foods. Food should be a pleasure for toddlers, not an emotional battleground that will haunt them all their lives.

Make eating and mealtime a normal, everyday experience for your toddler. It's the best way to teach them good eating habits. Toddlers are unsteady on their feet. Like walking, eating is a new experience for them. Be easy. Don't expect your toddler to become an instant good eater. Toddlers can be the most stubborn creatures on earth. Arm wrestling them into submission won't work. Show them instead.

Tell a toddler that they should eat something because it's good for them and you're likely to get a blank stare. A person (toddlers are people too) will only eat food they enjoy. Be honest. Would you eat something because someone told you it was good for you? Toddlers won't either.

Toddlers mimic what they see. When they see the family enjoying a healthy balanced meal, they'll begin to eat what you eat. Never force a new food on them. Give them time. They probably won't like the first taste but when they watch you and the rest of the family enjoying their food, your toddler might try it again next time.

Hint: Take a good look in the mirror. If they see you eating junk then junk must be good and they'll want the same junk. While you're looking in the mirror, examine your own eating habits and attitudes about food.

Step back and look carefully. Are mealtimes a pleasant family experience or contentious and unappetizing? Do you serve healthy food or feel good comfort food? Do you use sweets as rewards? Do you snack in front of the TV?

Early feelings and attitudes about food will follow your toddler for life. Turning to food for comfort or reward can easily lead to childhood obesity and become a lifelong weight problem for your child. Emotional aversions to certain foods born of fear and strife are just as unhealthy. It doesn't need to be that way. Your good example and patient understanding are the best teachers.

Learn more about this author, John McDevitt.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.