by Debbie Wiens

Created on: December 19, 2008

I like to think that I had raised my children to have giving hearts. I tried to be a good example. At the time that my children were probably 4, 6 and 10 years old, we were active church members in a church that worked with missions. My children grew up hearing about giving to the needy, how it was God's plan for us to care for the orphans and widows, and so on. We gave them a small allowance which a portion was assigned for giving in Sunday school, in order to teach them what was meant by "a cheerful giver". A decade later I can say that each of my children, even in the midst of teenage turmoil, still have the heart to give, to serve. Reflecting over the past years, there are a few instances that stand out on their paths to becoming the often generous young adults they are today.

We lived in Las Vegas, where my youngest two were born. Any of you who have lived or traveled in a big city are most likely familiar with people standing along side the road with signs. "will work for food", "stranded, please help" and so on. Las Vegas was not immune. One evening, after just purchasing a bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken, we were stopped at a light exiting a freeway. My oldest son - my middle child, then about 6 years old was just learning how to read. Upon seeing the slightly disheveled looking man holding the sign he naturally asked: "what does that say, Mommy?" Reading the sign to him, I replied "Stranded. Wife pregnant, hungry. Please help." I could almost hear the wheels in my son's head turning. "we should help him" He said.

Now here poses a dilema. I am trying to teach my children to be generous, and giving and yet not to be taken advantage of. Never had I been faced with the struggle between the two so clearly. I made the attempt to give my son a glimpse of unfortunate reality without stifiling his desire to do good. "Honey, sometimes people who stand with signs are not always being honest."

"What do you mean?" He asked, so innocently.

"Well, sometimes they just want people to give them money. They lie so people will feel sorry for them, so they can then buy things that they shouldn't, and so they don't have to work."

"is that always true?"

"well, no." I answered. Was this light EVER going to turn green? I could see his little brow furrowed, obviously troubled by this realization.

"I don't think he's lying, I think him and his wife are just hungry."

"Well, maybe, but we don't know." I answered slowly.

"God knows." He replied so matter of fact. "He can have my chicken, I'm not really very hungry anyway. Pleeeease mommy!"

How could I refuse. I rolled down my window and, somewhat begrudgingly I might add, motioned for the man to approach. I handed him two pieces of chicken wrapped in a napkin. "my son wants you and your wife to have his dinner"

The man took the food, and looked at me astonished and breathlessly said "it's still hot"

"well, it should be" I snapped. "I just bought it".

"Oh thank you little boy, thank you so much!" He seemed quite sincere, and my resolution that he was just a drug seeking scam artist of some type started to waver. He turned and jogged down the slight incline, almost out of site, where I saw a VERY pregnant woman struggle to her feet, grasping the chicken in her hands and beginning to devour it like she hadn't eaten in days.

To say the least, I was humbled. My son had taught me a valuable lesson that I tried to keep with me from that day on. It is not our place to judge those that appear to be in need. We are to give with a cheerful heart what we can, and often what we think we can't. And it's true, I discovered on that very enlightening evening, it often blesses the giver as much or more than the one who receives.

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