by Miss Kat

Created on: December 17, 2008

Should a parent move from a parent to a friend as children grow older? Unfortunately, there is no right or wrong answer for this question. A parent must do what he or she feels best and as a parent myself, I feel it my parental as well as personal duty to remain a parent no matter how old my children get.

It is true that in time, they will grow into adults, and we as parents can only hope that we did our absolute best in raising them properly, but there will come a time when, even as adults, our children will need their parents, not as friends, but as parents. They will come to us seeking our knowledge and wisdom. Knowledge and wisdom they feel only their parents can offer. As a an adult, I admit myself, there have been many times where I sought out my mother's advice and not the type of advice you can easily obtain from a close friend, but advice that only a mother can give. Even adults need guidance every now and then when their path becomes unclear and they don't know who to turn to.

In all honesty, as much as I will be both a friend and a parent when my children get older, I want them to know first and foremost that I am their mother. It would please me if they saw me as a friend, but I want the love and respect that only a child can give to the person who has known them their whole life, the person who has seen them during the happiest of times and during the worst. I don't want them to see me as anything less.

Some parents spend their lives trying to become friends with their children, and although I'm not criticizing those parents who choose to raise their children as friends, I feel that we as parents are there to guide them and to help them discover what type of person they wish to become. Yes, our children will grow up, but just because they are adults doesn't mean they will need their parents any less.

My children, no matter how old they get, will always, in my eyes, be my children and I will always be their mother. There is no good explanation that I can offer as to whether a parent should move from parent to friend as children grow older. All I can say, from my perspective, is that although being friends with my children would be fantastic, I would much rather be their parent. I'll still offer a friendly ear whenever they need, but I'm always going to offer a loving hug, an open door and an open heart because as a parent, this is what I was made to do.

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