by Mj Ferruzza

Created on: December 17, 2008

Dating and the Single Mother.
You are balancing the kids and a daily schedule which may include work, sitters, friends, relatives, shopping and if you are lucky some "Me" time. Your Ex may or may not be in the picture. You may feel alone or alienated from your married and committed friends. You have decided the time is right to throw yourself out there. But how does the single mother start back and succeed in the dating world? It takes some effort and energy on your part. It takes some resiliency and compromise. But follow these Dos and Don'ts and you can ease into the dating world while avoiding pitfalls like relying on the meat market and the bar scene.

1. Men want a woman... Not their Mom! While being a mother hen is a gracious and noble trait, being a woman is foremost the most attractive attribute you bring into dating. Yes! You love your kids. But also, you love your life and are willing to open it up and share it with a friend or partner. Going on and on about school, sports, awards and accomplishments that your kids have achieved are probably the most important topics in your life, they may not have the same impact on your date or partner. Temper your family enthusiasm by gauging the situation. If they seem interested and want to keep that area of the conversation going, continue on. If they are men...they pretty much want to talk about themselves, so you have to balance it all while somewhat stroking their ego as well.

2. Hey! Good looking!... No woman enters the dating scene without some self awareness. If you have lived in sweat pants for the past 6 months, it maybe time to spruce up your wardrobe. If you have been sneaking french fries from your kid's Happy Meals, you may want to become a bit more active. Now saying all that I will add that in dating and having a successful date, one must try to be their true self. If a man doesn't like you for the person on the inside, then they were after a false front in the first place. The same goes for the Single Mom. You want an active man? Become active yourself. Remember you attract the type of personality you want by exhibiting the same traits yourself.

3. "This time around I am going to date someone younger...or richer... or taller...or with more hair!" These are expectations and qualities that some Moms lay out in their quest for the mythical, perfect man. Some reflect causes for the separation or divorce from the Ex. Some are spite. Some are the qualities they wanted since they first started dating years

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