by Sandie Mcgary

Created on: December 17, 2008

I am an observer. It is my lot in life, my boyfriend disagrees completely with that statement. He just thinks I'm nosey, I'm not nosey just "observant." I have a bad habit of "observing" people while I sit at the stop lights. I'm not doing anything else other than staring impatiently at the stop light so I might as well check out what's going on around me. I am a firm believer that one should be aware of his or her surroundings. Well, at least that's my excuse anyway.

The other day I was sitting in traffic which was horrendous due to the upcoming holidays. I was rather far back in the line of traffic so I knew I would have to sit through a few light changes. As I'm waiting I happened to glance at the car next to me. Within minutes I was enthralled at the display going on in the cab of the car. A young man was obviously so caught up in his music that I'm not sure he was unaware of the show he was putting on. His head bobbing up and down like a head banger and playing his air guitar while bouncing in his seat so hard that his whole car was literally shaking. As I glanced at other cars around me I noticed that others were equally enthralled in this comical display of theatrical wonderment. Finally the light turned green and our little musical Thespian was well on his way.

On my way home from shopping I pulled up to the stop light at a busy intersection. This light is known to take up to ten minutes to change due to how busy the area is. I settled in my driver's seat expecting a long boring wait. Little did I know that I would soon be entertained by the girl in the next car. It started off innocently enough. She was looking around like we all usually do while stopped at a light, when she suddenly turned her head and discreetly sniffed her right armpit. She made a foul face and lifted her left arm up over her head like she was stretching and non chalantly shoved her nose into that armpit. I couldn't help it, I was intrigued. She reached down into the passengers seat, I am assuming she was getting her purse, and pulled out a small perfume bottle. She glanced around at the other cars briefly and began fervently spritzing her underarms. Once she was satisfied she had sprayed enough she then took her index finger and rubbed it under her left arm. I about lost it when she then sniffed her finger. I was laughing so hard that I got caught. This poor girls face lit red and when the light turned green she flipped me the bird before slamming on the gas and taking off.

The one question I truly want answered is this, why must men pick their noses in their vehicles? I can't count how many times I have been sitting at lights and the man in front of me or behind me started scratching his brains through his nostrils. It's not like they are just picking the tip of their noses, no they are knuckle deep in brain matter. Are they under the impression that just because they are inside the car that no one can see the act that they are committing? Now I completely understand having a boogie stuck that is restricting the proper air flow and the need to render that situation, but come on guys, in front of the whole 5 o'clock traffic jam? I recall as a young child my grandfather used to carry these square linen things, hmm, what were they called? People just don't use them as often anymore, oh yes, they're called handkerchiefs. Keep one in your truck, car or van guys. They come in handy when you have a renegade booger on the loose. Not to mention you will look a million times more attractive without your finger shoved up your nose and poking out of your ear.

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