by Wendy Owen

Created on: December 15, 2008

I have been going through menopause and I figured I'd write a few things about it today. I can get no advice from my mother on this subject because she breezed right through it with no problems at all. Just zip and it was over for her. I myself feel like Dr. Jeckel and Mr. Hyde. You know I seen a movie once and it was called how to lose a guy in ten days and while I was up at 3am this morning with insomnia (another effect from menopause) I was thinking about that movie for some reason and well I figure the easiest way to lose a guy in ten days would be to lock him in the room with you while your going through menopause and after ten days I promise you that you will never see him again.

I was told by a man the other day that he wished God would have used the funny bone instead of the rib to create women because I was one cranky person. I smiled sweetly and choked back the urge to smack him in the head, while envisioning him walking on coals because that's exactly what the hot flashes feel like. This made me feel a little less cranky. I wanted to thank him for that. Silly man thought he made me feel better by cracking a joke.

When I was a young girl we young ladies would get together and say, "Boys are stupid, throw rocks at them". Well now that I am a mature grown lady with grown children and grand babies and suddenly I find myself resisting the urge to throw rocks at my s/o while he lies sleeping and snoring because I am up unable to sleep and hot and sweaty and sad and happy and sad and happy, and emotionally challenged. So I think maybe today I will try to look up my old classmate Anna and see if she still wants to throw rocks at boys because I tell you, I'm game.

Being the kind gentle woman that I am I do my best not to wake him when I can not sleep. I quietly get out of the bed and get a cool rag to put on my face, then I go make my coffee and head back to the other end of the house to the home office to enter sweepstakes and such, all while resisting the urge to smack him and run. Then when he get's up he will say, " Are you gonna cook me breakfast or what", and I tell him kindly not to poke the bear or never anger the person who cooks your food or something to that effect.

So all in all the effects of menopause is weighing heavy on me today, but I'm trying to remain the woman that I always have been. I try not to blame my s/o for my anguish. I've been wondering this morning though that since they put a man on the moon in the 60's, then why can't they put them all up there now? Also as I think back to when I met my 2ndhusband I should have really gotten a younger man because they never mature anyhow. Lesson learned I suppose. I can't say that I am surviving menopause very elegantly but I'm giving it my best shot.

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