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Two forms of marriage extisted in Ancient Rome. One was mostly associated with the lower classes, and was called coemptio, or "wife purchase." The other was a solemn religious ceremony performed by two priests and was reserved for the upper classes.

The first option, the bride-purchase did have some ceremonial features, for three copper coins were brought by the bride. Two of them were given to the household "lares" and one was given to the bridegroom. It was a small and symbolic dowry. The God Juno was supposed to lead the bride to her new home and in her red veil she joined hands with her bridegroom. A procession accompanied them to their new home and the doorposts were anointed and adorned. The bride was lifted over the threshold, and the bridegroom presented her with fire and water. A feast would ensue with merriment and some possibly crude comments.

The upper classes, who identified themselves with the early invaders of Italy and saw themselves as having a more sacred and verbal form of marriage. The patricians, or the upper class, would have a religious ceremony with each of them exhanging wafers made of wheat. This was called confarreatio and it was strictly binding for life. Divorce among the patricians was forbidden and seen as more sacred than those marriages of "everyone else."

In both classes, men held the upper hand in the marriage as property could not be owned by women of either class, and women had as their sold meaning for life to be a servant to her man.

Later on in the History of Ancient Rome, a third form of marriage arose. It was a purely civil bond, called "usus." It became common throughout the empire. It is similar to today's common law marriage, as it became legal after the woman and man had lived together for a period of one year. It was a very loose bond. If the woman spent three nights away from her home, it did not become legal.

Marriage evolved very differently than from in Modern Western Europe and women in ancient times had a harsh life and could not hold property of any kind. Unmarried girls in the home were referred to as "invisa" or translated as "hated" or "detested." The reasons were partly as there were plenty of beautiful females brought in from the provinces by the soldiers and captured by pirates and brought in to the empire for lower classes of men to choose from. Higher classes, however, continued to hold their family name dear and they fostered a more solemn and honorable view of marriage and family.

The introduction of the dowry improved the lot of the women entering marriage, as the fathers of daughters married off could revoke the dowry if his daughter recieved ill treatment. The man still had the upper hand as the father of the bridegroom had all power over his daugher in law and the grandchildren.

There are evidences that married couples had a reverence and love for one another in artwork and artifacts. There is a sweet and warm portrait of a baker and his wife painted on a wall in the Pomeiian ruins dated the first century A.D. The couple obviously had a marriage that was respected as they paid for the portrait to commemorate their vows.

Learn more about this author, Brenda G. Koscelny.
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