by Can Tran

Created on: December 10, 2008

When I think about the possibility of being complete by being single, I have to say this: Yes, you can be single and complete. The feeling of completeness is different from one person to the other. But, it makes me think of this scene between Solid Snake and Big Boss in "Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots." It was the final scene before Big Boss had died. There was one thing that Big Boss which struck a nerve with me. He said that at the end, everything gets reduced to zero. We are born from nothing and at the end we become nothing.

In that respect, our lives begin at zero and our lives end at zero.

I am single and very happy with it. I do not necessarily feel I need companionship. But then again, other people do. I will admit that it does get a bit lonely being single. When I have bouts of loneliness, I rationalize and remember the reason I chose the single life. To be honest, the single life is the most liberating and euphoric thing for me.
I am not willing to give up those feelings of liberation and euphoria. I strongly feel that I can be complete without a companion. When I serious think about things, I consider myself to be a complete paradox. Human beings of are considered to be paradoxes because we have emotions and logic.
Both of them do conflict with each other.

I can be complete.
But, I have to ask myself this question: Do I want to be complete? It makes me think of this episode of "Heroes" Season 1 in which Nathan Petrelli had met Daniel Linderman. Linderman asks Nathan if he wants to live a live of happiness or a life of meaning.
Nathan wants to live both.
Linderman said that it could not be done. He said that to live a life of happiness, one needs to be content and always living in the present. To live a life of meaning, one must be condemned to wallow in the past while obsessing about the future.

Perhaps I am part of the latter. While being single, I have come to the realization of what I wanted to do. I found out my "purpose" in life. Overall, I had found something to keep me going.
I guess I am a paradox of paradoxes.
We are all looking to be content.
However, the one thing that makes me content is by not being content. There lies the paradox. I probably would be content if I had found love. Ultimately, I would not be content. I am a free spirit that does not like to be caged up.

The way I see it, the reason many people fear the single life is that they feel the need to have someone. But, the single life is great. If one would take the time to explore the possibilities of the single life, perhaps they would be happy. There are plenty of things I am able to do while being single. At the same time, there are plenty of things I would not be able to do while in a relationship.

You have more freedoms being single than you would have from being in a relationship. I have so many things I can do. If I was in a relationship, I would not be able to live my dreams and achieve my hopes. I have started to do a bit of traveling. If I was in a relationship, I would not be able to do all that traveling. The girlfriend would get on my case for "neglecting" her.

I can do whatever I want.
I can be with my thoughts and try to find my inner peace. I strongly feel I would not be able to attain inner peace if I was not single. For people looking for love, they have to realize that relationships take a lot of time, dedication, and commitment. Like it or not, many sacrifices have to be made in a relationship. Also, finding companionship does not necessarily mean that you are complete.
You can be complete as a single person.
If you are feeling lonely, you should spend time exploring the different horizons of possibilities. Hopefully, you will change your mindset.

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