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So there is an unholy trinity of comebacks that I learned a long time ago, some time near the beginning of high school, I think. All three are lame but consider them your 'fallbacks'; that is, no matter what someone says, these will work. These three comebacks are: 1)That's what she said 2)You wish 3) Anytime. Now I know that all three of these are very juvenile, but if nothing else works, they will

So as far as actual good comebacks go, they are few and far between. 'You should know.' For example, someone of the same sex as you who is straight(assuming you're also straight) says something like "I bet you're a terrible kisser." then you say " You should know". This one actually works much better for defending another person, but the person who you are making a comeback at generally can't pull off a humorous counter-comeback because the defense for this come back is often too technical to be funny. A similar defense to 'You should know' would be 'How would you know?'. All of the examples I can think of for this one are content violations but you can probably imagine.

Another form of comeback besides the direct comeback, and my personal favority, is a sarcastic comeback. Basically this can be overt sarcasm or just pretending that everything the person says is absolutely true and sometimes even that you're proud of it. This can range from a sarcastic laugh, a comment like "oh you know it", silence, over-hysterical laughing, and many other sarcastic gestures. The other form of this is to act completely and utterly serious. This one is far more tricky than the other. In fact, in order to make this one work, you almost have to be able to convince yourself that you're completely serious. Basically, the idea is to throw someone off so far that that they are unable to laugh, and thus make everyone else in the group bust into hysterics. You want to completely name and claim whatever the person says about you, and possibly even with enthusiasm or pride.

Another comeback, when you just can't think of anything else to do or say, is making an obscene gesture. But don't just make an obscene gesture, get creative with it. Make it into looking like you're playing an instrument, maybe an animal(especially a bird), or even make it look like a gift. There are literally hundreds of ways to do this, the more creative they are, the funnier it is. Doing this is far more hilarious than an objective comment but just as easy and universally applicable.

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