by Kalyani Kurup

Created on: December 06, 2008

WOMEN AND SELF ESTEEM -

A good measure of self-esteem is necessary for succeeding in life. And successful people have higher self-esteem. The two conditions are thus inextricably tangled in a chicken or egg, which came first?' situation. The conundrum becomes more complicated when the attribute is discussed in relation to women, because of the gender stereotyping that still exists.

Man has no problems with self-esteem in relation to his wife and children, though he could have enough of it at workplace. And woman's self esteem was neverconsidered important in a family till she too started bringing in the bucks that helped keep the hearth warm.

Self esteem, which is a sense of personal worth, is a combination of security and significance. A woman may have security with or without a successful career. Acceptance by the family, being loved the way she wants, acceptance by the society, or financial security, can give her a lot of security even when there are no personal achievements. But the other half of self-esteem, significance, has more to do with personal achievement. It results from financial success by her own accomplishment, excellence in career, or acceptance by the society for any other skill she might have.

Remaining active, and responsible, even if there is no salary involved, would give women a reasonable self esteem as long as she is not lorded over into doing every mundane thing, and as far as there is no negative gender stereotyping. Many women who have financial security may not be lacking self esteem, provided they have responsibilities and activities. Still, even in such a set up, those who have talents that go unrecognized, may suffer from a terrible lack of self esteem. A talent, which could be a creative ability, or a career skill, has to be properly channelized and should be allowed proper expression. Where that is not possible, a woman's self esteem would suffer enormously.

Anyway, nothing boosts a woman's self esteem like a successful career. Those who are able to pursue a career for which they have an innate skill, and thereby excel in it, expand and accrue self-esteem very fast. Too often it is seen that a woman's self-esteem is directly related to the level of her earnings. The more the earning power, the higher the self esteem. In cases where it is economic necessity alone that goads a woman to take up a job, that job may not be an esteem booster of the same level. Nevertheless, even such a job has the ability to boost esteem because a certain

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