by Ulovit

Created on: December 03, 2008

The very thought of becoming a parent can provoke a world wind of emotions, both good and bad, and rightfully so. Babies can bring so much joy into your life. But how can you know when it's the right choice versus a brash decision? Well, there are some things you may want to consider before you make a life changing decision.

One of the most important things that we seem to forget about children is that they are so much more than cute lovable, and sometimes hilarious, characters. Children are thinking feeling human beings, just like us. They look to you for financial sustenance, emotional guidance, and complete commitment. So you need to think about and be ready for the beautiful, albeit unglamorous, role you will have to play in your child's life.

FINANCES

Let's face it, if most of us waited until we could afford children we'd never have one. Children are expensive, and the tabs add up quickly. You'll need to consider food, clothing, childcare, recreation, and health care to start.

To give you an idea of the bottom line, you can calculate the potential costs on babycenter.com or bankrate.com. If your finances allow you to budget it out, then you might be in a good position financially. If not, realistically figure out a plan to be able to afford the potential costs. Perhaps you could start saving for your child in advance.

EMOTIONALITY

There are moments when you look into your child's eyes and forget about all of the problems and stressors that affect your day to day. For a moment, nothing else matters. Unfortunately, this is only for a moment. Life doesn't stop because you have a child. Children bring enhanced joy, as well as added stressors.

Parents are only people. We have the tendency to make mistakes and you will be no different. But before you consider raising a child, figure out exactly where you are emotionally. Sit down and ask yourself a few serious questions:

~ Do you handle stress well?
~ Are you a patient person?
~ Do you communicate clearly?
~ Do you have good conflict and resolution skill?
~ How well do you run on little sleep?
~ Do you have a temper?
~ How much of your life are you willing to sacrifice for your child?

These are all aspect of parenthood that will come into play the very moment your child takes his or her first breathe. If you're not sure of the answers, then you should ask close friends or family members. Sometimes people can serve as a mirror and tell you how you are perceived to others.

WHY DO YOU REALLY WANT TO HAVE A CHILD?

The last thing you want to do is have a child for the wrong reasons. Giving life can be one of the best decisions you've ever made. But there are considerations that need to be had before you do for everyone's best interest.

Too many children have been conceived to fulfill roles they can't possibly meet. Children don't fix struggling relationships, nor should they be used as ponds in them. Children aren't here for the sole purpose of loving their parent, nor should they be had because their parent's "clock is ticking,"or are "getting older." To have a child for these reasons would be selfish and unfair.

A child is an expression of love between you and your partner; in which the both of you have every intention of loving, nurturing, and raising that child as best you can. It is your job to provide your child a stable loving environment, so that they can become the best human being they can be.

Becoming a parent is one of the hardest and most important jobs you will ever endure in your life. And as long as you live, your job will never be done. Hopefully, you make an informed decision and think it through before you act. Good luck! As does every parent, you're going to need it.

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