by Daniel Tsunekawa

Created on: December 03, 2008   Last Updated: December 10, 2008

How can you tell if a man is a shy guy or if he is just not interested? Many women struggle through this ongoing dance of ambiguity. While it is a frustrating struggle there are a few simple things that you can do to tell the difference between a nervous or quiet guy and a polite rejection.

The first thing to do is to act. Do something. Don't expect him to come running up to you and lay it all on the line. Believe it or not, men are dying for you to take the first step and show a little interest.

This does not mean that you need to throw yourself at him. But small things like starting conversations and asking questions about him let him know that you are interested and friendly. Often if the man has to start all of the conversations or break an obvious silence, you can come off as unapproachable.
This is also a good chance for you to gauge his interest as well as an opportunity to get to know him and what kind of things he likes.

When gauging his interest in you it is important to observe some different responses and consider a few different possibilities. If he responds to your conversations and he often asks you questions too, then you know that he is at least interested in you as a person and he is not trying to blow you off or avoid you. If this is the case then continue to chat with him and see if he eventually asks you out. If he does respond to your questions but fails to start any conversations himself, he may simply be shy but delighted when you talk to him and simply unable to think of anything to talk to you about.
Continue to coax conversation and give him time to feel more comfortable and build up some courage. If he is uninterested then he will most likely politely answer your questions but seem a little terse or brief in his answers.

Remember, the main thing is action on your part.
If you never take a chance you can't expect him to. The more interaction you have with him the more opportunity you will have to feel out his feelings. Also through simple conversation you have an opportunity to get to know him more and decide whether he is the right guy for you.

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