by Shaz Slaughter

Created on: December 02, 2008

I myself have been sitting here and thinking about some conversations I've had over the last week or so. I'm sitting with a friend of mine I've known for a while says she wants a guy who is romantic and she can talk to and doesn't play games (you get my point). I tell her flat out "no you don't". Ladies here's the deal, now you say you what the guy that's into you and spends time with you and all that stuff and you say that because that is what you should want.... logically.

Unfortunately humans, MEN and WOMEN are not logical when it comes to matters of the heart. For example you say you want the guy who listens to you and hangs out with you and the guy who likes you for you without reservation and would do anything for you. Guess what chances are you already know that guy. No you say, but you do. Fact is most women know a guy that they talk to that's not related to them and he just sits there and listens as you go on and on with the conversation of nothingness that was your day.

See the problem isn't that the guy you want is not out there, the problem is that the guy that's out there you don't want. I can hear it now "that doesn't make any sense" you either think or say out loud, but lets really examine the whole human selection thing. Lets say you have the little nerdy Steve that lives across the way from you (I apologize to anyone reading this happened to be named Steve). You call him up to talk for 4 hours about your ex-boyfriend. Ladies if a guy is going to use that much of his free time to listen to you say the same thing over and over again for 4 hours.....he likes you.

Chances are he does not have the courage to ask you out. Which leads me to my next point, you don't see Steve in that light because.... no one else does. Here you have a guy you, knows everything about you because you go on and on ranting about how men don't listen to you mean while the ONLY thing you know about Steve is his name. I've found in general people want what other people want.

What do I mean? Well let's say you find a sparkly rock. People are constantly asking you about your rock and even some people offer to buy it. What does that mean? It means that your little rock has value. So you hold on to it.... because you have something everyone else wants. Let's reexamine your new found shiny rock, but no one else wants it. Well it must not be worth anything. Chances are you'll get rid of it.

My point is the reason why a lot of people go after the person that is the opposite of what they "say" they want is because they really want the person who is not available (Logically it doesn't make sense. Emotionally if that person is not available then they are busy, if they are busy then they are important, if they are important then they are worth having) or something like that. People "say" they want someone who is true to them, but stay forever with the person who constantly and obviously cheats on them (Again Logically makes no sense. Emotionally if so many other people want that person besides me then they MUST be worth holding on to.

Again let's look at the other side if that person only wants to spend time with you then chances are you get boarded and want them to go away. (Logically this too does not make sense. Emotionally one thinks well they must not have anything else to do and they must be a loser). I'm not trying to tell you who to like, but next time just consider what you are looking for may be right in front of you!

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