by Kimberly Devine

Created on: December 02, 2008

Marriage is a difficult journey. A successful, long-lasting marriage requires an understanding of the committment of marriage, but can society place an arbitrary age on when an individual has reached that understanding? No. We should place a legal minimum age and help individuals reach a maturity level which gives them the skills to decide after that age.

Legally, an individual should not be able to marry before the age of 18. This is considered the age of consent, the voting age, the civil service age. Prior to 18, individuals are not able to commit to most legal contracts. They cannot be expected to commit to a marriage contract. After an adult reaches 18-years-old, he must be respected in his ability to choose and commit to a lifetime partner.

What must we teach our children about marriage, so that they are able to make smart decisions? First, it is important to consider what a marriage really requires.

Marriage requires mutual respect. Mutual respect lends a positive light to a partner's every opinion, and increases the appreciation of one's partner.

All marriages based solely on infatuated love face a time when the illusionary bubble shatters. Each partner realizes that the other is human and flawed. Each realizes that marriage can feel miserable, because of the pain the other partner can inflict. This pain is worse when an individual believes that marriage to a person you love should be easy. In the throes of marriage difficulty, one can begin to believe it will never get better.

An individual must rely on the respect he holds for his partner in order to stay committed. The difficult times, successfully conquered, increase the mutual respect and deepen the love.

Another important side of mutual respect is self-restraint. Love should be enough to prevent harsh words that cannot be taken back, but hurt love can produce some of the harshest words. Respect for a partner can instill reason to a situation that would otherwise be purely emotional. Love should prevent casual cruelty, but an individual who does not respect his partner cannot truly love her.

Every child should be taught that marriage is hard, but rewarding, work. Children should be taught not to consider a marriage if they are not ready to make it the most important thing in their lives, a commitment as precious and long-standing as the birth of a child. If the marriage fails, it will feel like a death.

Sometimes, the most difficult part of this lesson is understanding that the potential partner should

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