by Melissa R. Bickel

Created on: December 02, 2008   Last Updated: February 17, 2009

You're interested and you want him to know. You've given him all the right signals, but he hasn't responded. Your attempts to draw him in appear to fall on an expressionless face. Are these signs the guy is not interested? Could he just be shy? What can you look for to discern if he is shy or truly isn't interested?

Shyness or a lack of interest can send conflicting signals. Watch his behavior. Does he blush, twitch his hands, avoid eye contact? Watch how he acts around you. Does he show any interest whatsoever?

A guy who is shy may be interested in you, but his behavior may be misleading. Look for the signs of shyness. Is he hesitant to talk? When he does, is he stumbling over his words? Does his face keep turning red? It might not be easy to meet someone he's interested in and he could be getting upset and being less able to deal with conversations. It's not easy to carry on a conversation for a shy person, especially if they are interested in you! His and your nerves could leave you both uncomfortable. Yet, despite all this (shyness aside) he'll probably ask for your phone number.

A guy who isn't interested won't want to be around you. He'll cut you off when you are trying to talk to him. He might even just ignore you all together. More than likely he'll make fun of you, especially when his friends are around. When you try to engage him in conversation, he may pretend he doesn't hear you and walk away as fast as he can. If he is in the middle of a conversation and doesn't include you in the conversation (even though you are standing right there and everyone else is chatting away) then he isn't interested. He certainly won't be asking for your phone number. He'll avoid you whenever he can.

Whether the guy you are interested in is shy or not, if he is interested he'll want to be around you. It's obvious when someone takes a liking to you. They treat you with respect and actually care about what you have to say. No matter how he acts, you'll be the focus of his affection and sometimes boyish attention. Guys aren't exactly great at communicating their feelings. Their communications skills usually revolve around backslapping and chest pounding. So, sometimes you need to see beyond the cobwebs that clog their communicative skills.

Just take note. If the guy you are interested in morphs into the proverbial Neanderthal, don't waste your time trying to break down the walls he erects. His lame attempts (yes lame) of giving you the cold shoulder lets you know right away he isn't interested. Walk away as fast as you can, count yourself fortunate you weren't left holding his Neanderthal club!

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