by Grace Glassier

Created on: November 30, 2008   Last Updated: October 17, 2010

1. The stuff he wants

2. The stuff he needs and won't buy for himself

3. The stuff you think he needs or wants

Men in their early twenties will smile and thank you for just about any gift. They still haven't lost that "golly gee whiz, for me?" genuine graciousness that so many of us have misplaced in our years of jaded consumerism. But what we gift givers really want to elicit is that "high five, happy dance, fist pumping, up on his feet, air guitar strumming" response that this man-boy can occasionally produce. Gifts in category 3 just "won't get it". Not by a long shot.

If you're the young man's boss, secret Santa, or aunt in Albuquerque feel free to select a gift in category 3. You might even get a nice little "thank you" note. But if you are either a good friend, favorite parent, or his main squeeze, you really need to be thinking about what is in his category 1. But beware: some category (cat.) 2 and 3 gifts come cleverly disguised as cat. 1. Forget the shaving and manicure sets, expensive pens, candles, blenders, irons, and steak knifes (well, OK maybe the steak knives can fly but only if you get a dozen strip steaks to accompany them www.omahasteaks.com).

Only the consummate, experienced gift givers know how to separate the category 3 gifts, from the category ones or twos. And considering myself (ahem) to be among the best of the cat.3 gift givers, let me offer you a few ideas:

Think gadgets, gadgets, and more gadgets. They can be found at every price point. That 20-something man you adore is only a decade beyond puberty and he needs toys. By now, he probably has an Xbox, Sony Wii, or Playstation. If not, get him one if you can afford it. But the hottest titles in any gaming format are sure to be a hit. You may love the The Sims and DanceDance Revolution, but he needs to win the game or save the universe (preferably by blowing up some bad guys), so the more action the better. Anything in the Halo, Grandtheft Auto, or Call of Duty series work nicely. Even if your guy hasn't a whit of musical talent, he can be a Guitar Hero or play in a Rock Band in his own little virtual Idaho (www.amazon.com).

Lazertag Multi-player Battle System (www.samsclub.com) will appeal to the athletes, the geeks and all men in between. Even guys too wimpy for paintball can enjoy computerized laser tag. He can even hook up to his television and play solo. Bonus!

A watch that plays MP4 films calls to mind something Q, from the James Bond series, might have

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