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Adopting older children. I will approach from, maybe strange, view. I think every person is like one world, maybe world is too small to express person. What I mean is, in every person there is a world inside and it is different in all people. There are two main points I see, that is difficulties in it. First, they can not love each other like parent and a child, the second is difficulties in getting on well together.

Nowadays, I feel very unhappy when I hear child asking his/her parents if they love him/her, or parents asking their children. Why? Because I can not understand, how parent or child can doubt in love of each other? I know I have never said my father that I love him, but he knows it and I am sure of it. If I say that I love him, then he may doubt I guess. What I mean is, the love between parents and children is certain, and maybe an example to real love. If you adopt older children, then it may be problematic quite. Because, child can not love you as parents, surely, neither you can love them as your own child. Child may love you, but as a good person, a person who loves him/her, a person who helps him/her. This is very different love than love between parents and children.

The second difficulty is that, there may be difficulties in communicating, getting on well. Why? As I stated before, every person is like a different world, with its own rules, so if you want to unit two different worlds, there will be conflict among them. But when child is young, imagine it like small world which is just created and no rules and nothing, you can easily unit it with another developed world. But when both worlds are developed, then none of them will like when someone wants to change its rules. What I mean is, when parents give advices to adopted older children, they may not want to listen to them. You can not shout at adopted older children as you do to your own children. Your own children have no doubt in your love, but adopted children may easily doubt your love.

In conclusion, it is better to adopt children when they are very young, when their world is undeveloped, when their conscience is very weak. As I stated above there is no such love like the love between parents and children, but if you adopt older children you can not have such love. Older children knows everything about world, life, parents, they grow up with hate towards their own parents who left them. They will sove you of course, but not like children love their parents.

Learn more about this author, Gafa Werther.
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