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bound for America. Hiding in the engine room with her infant son, she tried to keep him comfortable and quiet. But in the middle

of the Atlantic Ocean, they were discovered and arrested. Eventually cleared of the FBI's suspicions of espionage, she was helped by a New York congressman. He passed

legislation, which allowed her to stay in America and paved the way for thousands of other war brides to be reunited with their families. Together with her handsome soldier

and her wonderful son, mom was ready to start her new life in this strange land and strive for the American dream.

Her romantic story, embedded in my memory, felt like it unfolded an eternity ago. This brave woman was now in the fall of her life. At first, the gripping fear of losing her would not set me free. My unconscious thoughts held me hostage and would not let me sleep at night. I wrestled with unresolved emotions from a sometimes-rocky, mother-daughter relationship. I was a severely sensitive and fearful child, who often withdrew inside myself when my mother disciplined me. I had repeatedly misunderstood her demands on my life and built a wall between us.

My mother became weaker each time I came to visit. In fact, as the cancer spread, mom's mind occasionally would fade away into a blank emptiness. Since she had an incredibly high IQ, the stark difference was painful to see for those of us who loved her.

Finally, she needed my help to bathe. Stripped of her defenses and her clothing, my mom's hand reached for mine as she stumbled into the shower. "Your hands give me strength," she whispered, as I helped her with a ritual that should have been private. When we finished, I wrapped her in a soft towel and silence comforted us like an old friend. The special unspoken bond developing between us was healthy and strong. When she looked into my sad eyes and said, "I love you, Kath," the walls between us came crashing down forever. Our remaining time together, for the most part, became full of reassuring smiles, and shared blessings that usually go unnoticed.
My mother lived her life like a prizefighter. Every challenge that she faced made her stronger. When she passed away, her legacy of inner fortitude, courage and determination to win were passed down to me. All the things she taught by example came rushing in giving me strength to survive as a single parent for many years.
When my teenage daughter became an unwed mother, that same strength was passed down to her. Although there were times my daughter wanted to give up and hide, she remembered her grandmother's words of wisdom, "You only lose when you give up the fight."
My mom fought the good fight and I'm proud to be her daughter.

Learn more about this author, Kathy Stemke.
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