by Ann Marie Dwyer

Created on: November 22, 2008

The strictest definition of discipline is punishment. Punishment has three definitions: 1. suffering, pain, or loss that serves as retribution; 2. a penalty inflicted on an offender through judicial procedure; or 3. severe, rough, or disastrous treatment. Parents should not consider pain, suffering and retribution as an avenue for raising children.

As it pertains to children, the definition of discipline parents must use is: Training that corrects, molds, or perfects the mental faculties or moral character. Discipline is synonymous with parenting: The raising of a child by parents.

Raising a child means teaching, caring, providing and elevating. Parents must teach the child to survive; care for his mental well-being; provide for his needs and elevate his morals and status in the world. Keeping all of those tasks in order requires parents to organize their time, knowledge and resources. Discipline is the organizing tool.

Many parents profess providing for a child is the easy part of parenting. Merely paying the bills and putting food on the table and clothes in closet is a physical task without many obstacles. Compared to teaching the ways of the world and building moral character in a child, it is easy. Developing and implementing an effective discipline strategy is difficult, but not impossible.

Every parent has boundaries, a list of things which will not be permitted under any circumstance. With these boundaries come consequences, what will happen if the child does one of those things. Parents must remember that discipline begins with the list, not the consequences. So how does discipline become parenting without becoming punishment? Ben Franklin said it first: "An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure."

Franklin knew that making small sacrifices before a crisis arose was always preferable to many reparations afterward. Incremental steps toward building moral character in a child is far easier than correcting misbehavior after it happens. When building a discipline strategy, begin with daily examples of making the right choices.

Teaching a child to share is a simple example of learning complex morality. A child learns to give and take in turn or work in concert by sharing. The majority of societal laws are based on these principles. Sharing demonstrates the concept of ownership, which precludes theft. It illuminates personal space, which precludes violent acts like rape. The seeds of right and wrong are sown early.

Sharing is also a field of choices: What

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