by Dawna Dees

Created on: November 22, 2008

First off, I have a policy. If you do not keep your own room clean and I have to go in there and clean it, I can look at anything I want. Therefor, if you want the first line of privacy, you will keep your room in order. This has worked well with all three, so far. My oldest daughter, 19 years in age, is now a U.S.Marine and my twins are 16 years in age. I have always been fair when it comes to privacy in our home and expect it in return as well. It is also a good idea to remain calm and have a cool approach if you do stumble onto incriminating evidence during a breach in any areas that seem as though one might feel is private. Whether or not it was can be justified later or you could just say, "I don't recall it being 'approved' as a private area, I don't even recall you submitting it for official recognition." Keep it professional sounding and they never question it, to them it sounds right, even though it's not in their favor.

Another peg in privacy level can become effected if trust has been violated by a teen. The level of privacy that the teen will receive depends on the number of times their behavior effects the level of trust I retain. If they have a constant disregard for rules or authority, the level of trust will become low. When this happens, it is my responsibility as a parent (a caring parent) to analyze and possibly investigate why my teen is having problems. During moments where I have a genuine concern for their well being and their ability to handle what they are experiencing, I will veto any active privacy house-laws to keep my kid safe, being nonchalant as possible of coarse.

Having a teen, today, can be down right scary at times. No joke. Teens are in an experimental stage in life and the most important thing in the world to them is FRIENDS. Even if you and your kid(s) are best buds, like I am with my own, FRIENDS matter more. You can not change that, at least not for a little while. There are numerous kids that are living in unstable homes. Not even half of all teens have parents they can stand. When you also consider that there are parents who are abusive, that are alcoholics, drug addicts or even mentally ill; the product child will be searching for a way to ease that pain in their life. This may be by using, drinking or abusing themselves or someone else.

Defense parenting is important for protecting your teen from getting locked into a relationship with friends that could become dangerous. At this age your child is not experienced enough

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