by Ernest Capraro

Created on: November 22, 2008

Bad choices aren't as common as a person might think. Choices are often made on the basis of what seems best at the time. Only later, when the results fail to meet expectations, does a person look back and say, "Wow, that was a bad choice." What they really mean is they don't like the way events unfolded afterwards.

Any decision is rooted in three domains: emotion, knowledge, and wisdom. Each plays an important part in making a choice, and in certain situations each can take the dominant role. As is often the case, it is rare for any three voices to be in agreement, so for any choice that is made, there will always be the "should have, could have, would have" lurking in the back of the mind, waiting to present itself with "see, I told you so - if only you had listened...". Life being what it is, almost every decision has a down side to it, so there is always something to regret. A person who dwells on how choices might have been made differently will not find much but frustration. Most decisions have an upside, so the optimist will recognize that something good comes of each choice, and accepts that negatives come as well. Rather than seeking to change the past, the positive approach is to learn from the experience, and apply it towards future decisions.

Emotion is a powerful motivator. It is the only factor in decisions made as small children, and remains powerful throughout adulthood. Need, desire, hunger, thirst, discomfort, warmth, love, hate...all such stimuli drive an emotional decision. Emotion only considers the present. "Right now" is the hallmark of emotional decisions. (For most people, "should I have ketchup or barbecue sauce?" is an emotional decision.)

Knowledge is acquired over time, through study and experience. It works to temper emotion, providing known facts and consequences for potential decisions. Knowledge has its limits in what is known. If a person has no knowledge (or incomplete knowledge) of a situation, a rational decision is unlikely. Knowledge tends to be dominant in making decisions when there is time to research or analyze the choices to be made. ("How should I invest my retirement funds?")

Wisdom too is gained over time, and much more slowly than knowledge. Whereas knowledge deals with specifics, wisdom heralds a broader understanding of life and people in general. Wisdom provides guidance when facing unfamiliar decisions. Wisdom also can serve as a tie-breaker or compromiser between the other two. Choices made with true wisdom are

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