by Susan Lower

Created on: November 21, 2008   Last Updated: January 27, 2009

Seeking a good neighbor is like searching for a job candidate, and requires intensive interviews. Unfortunately, we can't all go knocking on strangers' doors and interrogating them before we move in beside them. However, being a good neighbor, yourself, you can set an example for those around you to follow.

When new neighbors move into your neighborhood, introduce yourself. They are just afraid of you, as you are of them, since until you find out each other's names you're both strangers. This works the other way around too; don't wait for neighbors to come knocking on your door. If you see a neighbor outside, walk across the lawn and say hello. Don't be shy. Your neighbors are just as important as the members of your family. Invite them over for a barbeque or family game night.

A good neighbor is respectful of the other neighbors around them. They don't try to push the boundaries between property lines, and if there is a questionable item, like a tree needing cut down or a fence unknown to whose side it belongs, then discuss it, don't argue, fight, or banter. Don't leave trash laying around close to your neighbor's home, or burn garbage when the wind is blowing in their direction. If you must, warn them ahead of time, so at least they can close the windows. Of course, noise it the biggest problem amongst close neighbors. During the hours of the night try to be mindful of other people's rest, you wouldn't appreciate being woke up at 3am either.

The most important quality a good neighbor can posses is to be helpful. Your neighbors, like you, will need help at some point in their lives, and a good neighbor will always be there to lend the extra hand. At a time when jobs are decreasing, elderly are left alone, and single mothers are struggling to raise children, your single act of generosity could pose a great gift to the person living beside you. It may come in the form of raking leaves, mowing a lawn, watching children in the event of an emergency, or running an errand or two while you're headed in the same direction. The helpful deeds of a good neighbor never go unnoticed, even though you may not think they are ever acknowledged.

From the bible, it tells us to "love thy neighbor as thy self." It takes a compassionate neighbor to tend to someone when they are ill. It only takes five minutes to heat up a can of soup and make a neighbor a nourishing meal. New born babies bring a load of responsibilities home with them during the first few days of birth. A simple gesture of a meal, a gift basket full of baby necessities, or simply coming over and cradling junior while mother sleeps, means more than a simple shout of congratulations.

Friendly neighbors are always good neighbors, even when the neighbors around you first don't respond to your efforts, keep smiling. A smile a day, keeps you positive, and will eventually rub off on those around you. Say hello in the morning, wave in the afternoon, and eventually the other neighbors around you will flock to your uplifting attitude. No one likes to be alone, ignored, or feel unimportant. The grumpiest of neighbors might clear their throat at your gestures, but sooner or later, they will reciprocate them. So keep smiling, even the weather outside is dreary.

When you are a good neighbor and demonstrate the above qualities. You set the standard for those in your neighborhood to follow.

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