by Alex Oliver

Created on: November 18, 2008

The most fantastic quote I have ever heard is "if I was half the man I thought I was, I'd actually be twice the man I really am", and lately, there's been a few times now where I've had to stop and think, OMG how can this be................I was wrong!. It takes a big man to admit that he was wrong and that's why I'd swear the Eiffel tower was made of rubber if it would get me out a hole. So I've taken a long hard look at myself and I'm shocked to report, its not pretty, I think I've been over selling myself to myself again!

You see, in my head, I could run a 24 mile marathon in record time.......................but in reality I couldn't run to the end of the street without an oxygen mask and a full medivac team on standby, and it was these sorts of reality checks that helped me conclude I was selling myself as being better than I actually was, like I was all mobile and no contract. So I started looking at myself, at the things I did, I say, they way I acted, and asked some people around me if what I thought about me was the same as they thought about me, so here goes........................Throughout my whole life especially in my teens I never really bothered about things like being good looking I always just accepted, while I may not have been first in line in the looks queue, neither was I behind Quasimodo, so again in my head, as long as my job prospects had nothing to do with ringing bells I was doing ok. Although, apparently to my friends, I have a kind "lived in" face which as my "ex" best friend put it so eloquently you'd think my face has been on fire and someone put it out with a shovel! Now you would think that was the revelation, the eye opener right there, wouldn't you? but ohm no worse was to come.
I wanted to ask what my friends thought about my times of quiet reflection, those special times, where I would sometimes sit for hours just staring into space and contemplating life, to which they lovingly referred to as my "mood swings!"........mood swings I cried! that's not mood swings that's just me contemplating life! and choosing to ignore all of you! I was devastated, this journey of discovery had lead me to discover, in a very short space of time, that my friends thought not only was I ugly but that I was moody too! I did try to argue my point and explain that they were all wrong, but you cant argue with a man who calls you ugly when he's holding a mirror and that put me in a foul mood! so I decided it might be best for the sake of our friendship to stop this train journey of discovery before it left the platform because it just wasn't going the way I was expecting it to.

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