"God will always hear you when you pray." I have heard people say this over and over in my lifetime, and I believe that it is the single biggest misconception about prayer.
Praying With a Clean Heart
Prayer itself is no misconception; however, people have trouble in the proper use of it. For instance, where many people say that God will always hear us when we pray, the Bible clearly states "If I regard iniquity in my heart, the Lord will not hear me." (Psalm 66:18)
The root of the word 'regard' is to approve or allow with joy, and 'iniquity' of course, is wickedness or sin. Clearly, if we come to the Lord with un-confessed sin, He will not hear our prayers to begin with, let alone answer them to our satisfaction.
I realize that is an unpopular thing to say, in a time where we each interpret the word 'sin' in our own way. Unfortunately for most, the Lord is not as open-minded about the definition of sin, and it really does not matter what we claim on the issue. If we retain feelings in our heart (or pleasure in things) God calls sin, we have effectively closed the door of communication to Him. It is as simple as that.
Instead of being offended at what God considers sin, why don't we just believe Him when He says "For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;" (Romans 3:23) and use every prayer first for confession and repentance? It cannot hurt to hold a clear conscience before God, and the best way to do so is to confess everything that falls under the umbrella cast in His word. Claiming our own interpretation or quoting the beliefs of others we have patterned our lives after is not acceptable when God has so clearly defined things for us in the Bible. The first step to answered prayer, then, is to pray with a heart freshly cleansed from sin.
Asking and Receiving:
We can all quote the verses on asking and receiving, be it the verses that say "ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock and it shall be opened unto you" (Luke 11:9, Matthew 7:7) or the verses that tell us "And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive." (Matthew 21:22), or even "Ask, and ye shall receive, that your joy may be full."
We can draw from those verses that the Lord is pleased for us to seek and find Him; that He loves to answer our prayers. The misconceptions people have about these verses, though; happen when they leave out important key words like 'believing'. Faith is so essential to every aspect of our lives as believers.
We should also always pray the Lord's will. The Lord's example prayer includes 'thy will be done'. (Mt 6:10, Luke 11:2) Even Jesus Christ prayed for the will of God before His capture and subsequent death: "O my Father, if this cup may not pass away from me, except I drink it, thy will be done." (Matthew 26:42)
We should always ask for His will over our desires, even when life turns for the worse. Ask "If it be your will, take this trial from me. If I am to learn from it, please show me the lesson, and help me to appreciate and apply it." The same applies to selfish prayers for things we want but do not need: "Dear Lord, I would love to have a second well-running car if it would be your will."
People scoff at acquiescing to the Lord's will, but that does not make it any less valid or important. Pray with humility, seeking God's will. Even the bad things shape who we are, or can become a blessing. Keeping a humble heart and praying in God's will is a great way to safeguard against bitterness.
Last, I want to look at praying in God's name. People tend to abuse God's instructions to pray in His name. The misconception, again, does not lie in the prayer or the Bible, but in the interpretation and use. John 14:13 says "And whatsover ye shall ask in my name, that will I do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son." John 14:14, 15:16 and 16:23, 24 and 26 all carry the same concept.
This does not mean that every time we decide we need a 'favor' from God, He will answer with a big yes. Asking for a win at the lottery, for instance, or that your brand of beer would be on sale, is selfish and petty, and throwng God's name on them does not make them any less so.
The bottom line is this: prayer is meant to draw us closer to the Savior in the same way a loving conversation draws a child and parent closer together. It is not the parents obligation to always say 'yes'. Often as a mother I will refuse my daughter's seemingly innocent requests because I know the long term cause and affects of the things that look so good to her in the present.
As a Christian, your relationship with Chris is mutual. It was instigated by you, and requires effort on your part. Showing up on His doorstep only when you are in need - even using His name - is not only rude and ineffective, it misses the point completely. The misconception of or in prayer is not that it does not work, it is that prayer is a one-way street instead of mutual communication. Scripture studied, prayer holds requirements on our part as does anything else, and if we do not meet those, God is in no way obliged to even listen, much less answer.