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yourself and this sounds 'trite' but it really is not when you know how to do this. Make a list of things you like about yourself. Do one thing each day which celebrates your inner beauty and strength (it could be laughing or making something creative). You are unique and so many people forget this. What you think is odd or silly may be surprisingly wonderful and different. This is the hardest step. Whatever negative beliefs you have trained yourself in are wrong and only come from people who wanted to make you feel less than them. YOU are capable of many things. When you appreciate yourself you will give more to others and yourself and you will possibly 'give off this vibe' to the abuser. He/she will not know what to do with this and that is their prerogative. Remember, they want to 'control' you. When you become 'yourself' it is difficult for them to control you.

The second step is to seek assistance. When you come to a place where you 'truly' believe that you are worthy of being treated well (and as well as you would treat another), you will seek help. When you seek help, do not give into the manipulative words or actions of the abuser. 'If they have done it before, they will do it again'. I dread making that statement but in essence, 'MOST' poeple do not change. Are you prepared to 'hope' that they will in the next 5, 10, 20 years? Some do, most do not. One point - if they are really going to change, you will leave and they will beg for your forgiveness, showing that change over a LONG period of time. Anyway, you will be either happily single or in a functional relationship by then!

I will leave my article here but I hope it has provided some assistance and a start to a new path. It is a really hard one but you will be so proud of yourself if you can at least start to see your own worth and the real you. It is a matter of being strong in yourself and knowing that you only need yourself. The first step is the hardest but it can be done. I hope I can share more with you in the future. Good luck!

Learn more about this author, Rebecca White.
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