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You've heard the term 'kill 'em with kindness,' but what does it really mean? And how the heck do you act kindly toward someone who's taking every chance they get to irritate, annoy, and really, really make you mad?

First things first; one at a time! We've all got one person who annoys us more than anyone else. It might be a co-worker, your spouse, your teenager's best friend. It doesn't matter who is highest on your hit list. This method will not only throw your perpetrator off your trail, but it will give a little burst of joy each and every time you apply it.

Once you've identified your first victim, take a deep breath. This will not be easy, but the rewards will make it so worthwhile, you'll find it much easier to employ each time you try. The first scenario you encounter will certainly vary, but a big, wide smile, right off the bat, will diffuse much of the nastiness being readied to aim directly for you. Let me repeat, this will not be easy. Smile your most genuine smile and brace yourself.

It is likely, after a conversation begins, that you will be able to smile, nod and agree. Agree wholeheartedly with whatever is being said. Keep in mind while you're looking this person straight in the eyes, that it really doesn't matter who is right. If you know you're right about a situation, then that's that. As soon as the encounter is over, you will be able to go right back to whatever you were doing and however you were doing it. People like this are simply looking for some level of disagreement. If you don't give it to them, no matter how outrageous their claims, they'll realize their twisted needs are not being met, and they'll simply leave. Unfortunately, they will most assuredly go pick on someone else. If you see it happening, direct that person to this article as well! :)

After the smiles, nods and agreement, if this person still persists. You simply ignore them. This may be exactly what your mother told you to do with the bully at school. Some people believe if you punch the bully in the mouth, he'll stop picking on you. That may be so, but this article is about kindness. He will also stop picking on you if you smile, nod and then act as if he's not even there. Don't give him a reason to persist. Put on your best actor's hat and pretend if you have to. Pretend stupidity, pretend fake niceness, whatever you have to do.

Now, if you really want to have some fun with this, and give this person a taste of his/her own medicine, pour on the kindness like there's no tomorrow. Annoy them with it as much as you desire. Example: you're driving in traffic and you accidentally make a move that annoys another driver. It's likely that you know you did it, but you also know you didn't mean to. The road-rager is overreacting. The most fun thing to do if you get yelled at, threatened, or flipped off: wave! Just smile and wave, as though the other driver is a long lost friend that you haven't seen in years. Since the other driver is already mad, and now his reaction has apparently gone completely unnoticed by you, this enrages the driver further, but he will likely give up and speed off to an altercation with someone else. Off you go...

So, bring your least favorite co-worker annoying little gifts. Say 'hello' and ask lots of questions about his/her weekend. Just be the most annoying nice person you can be. Smiling really is contagious, and it's likely that your antics will provide entertainment for others around you, as they probably encounter the same problems with the same people as you. Step out of your shell, pretend if you have to, and pour on the kindness. Let them wallow in it. It's so much fun it will definately brighten the day.

Learn more about this author, Jeannie Pitt.
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