by Helen Tay

Created on: November 12, 2008   Last Updated: November 13, 2008

Grudges are the negative feelings we hold on to after any encounter we have with others that we felt we have been short changed. It could be what had been said to us that was negative or even a deed done or not done to us. Whatever grudges we have towards others, we hold on to them to tell ourselves that we are better off than the other person.

The question here is Do we grow out of them? Firstly, before we even ask ourselves this question, let us ask ourselves another question "Could we be willing to let the grudges go?" If we do not want to let the grudges go, are we able to identify the emotions linked to the grudge? If we can identify the emotion such as anger, jealousy, envy or frustration, then we ask ourselves, "Would we be willing to let it go?"

The answer lies in whether we want to free ourselves of the grudge or we want to continue to feel that we are a better person. If we are willing to let it go, then the next question would be "When are we willing to let the grudges go?" If we answer No, we ask ourselves the reason why and when we think we can let it go. If we answered "Yes" then we take a deep breath, think of the grudge and exhale it out with a loud sound of letting go of something in our body. If you continue to hold on to it, please understand that this is the choice you make to hold yourself a prisoner in your own life. It is your choice and no one coerced you to make that choice. It is a simple and powerful life changing decision.

If you have made the conscious choice to release the grudges that hold you back, does it not feel better after releasing them from our inner selves? Once we are able to let the grudges go, we no longer torture ourselves with the burden of carrying the grudges in us and those grudges do not serve us. They cause us to be in a dis-ease state and when we care for ourselves, we let the dis-ease go instantly.

If we are able to ask ourselves these three questions;

1. Could we be willing to let our grudges go?

2. Would we be willing to let our grudges go?

3. When?

My friends, do we now still need to ask the question "Do we grow out of them?" The question no longer hold any grounds as we now have a choice to free ourselves from any grudges before the grudges cause us to be in dis-ease state. All of us have a choice to make ourselves whole and healthy and we do so by empowering ourselves with the choices we make moment by moment. We choose to make decisions which empower us and not otherwise.

Choose to make the decision to let go all of your grudges you have carried with you and free yourself. Understand that by letting go the grudges you are not helping the person you hold a grudge to; you are helping yourself be free of all the negative emotions that are tied to the grudges and stopping you from being the whole you, the powerful and real you.

Do yourself a big favor and make the decision to let go any of the grudges you have been holding on to. Take a quiet moment to think of any grudges you have against someone and make the choice to let it go. This decision will serve you and enable you to live a full life that you desire.

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