by Nick Osaada

Created on: November 11, 2008   Last Updated: December 08, 2008

Nineteenth-century British philosopher and idealist Francis Herbert Bradley once said, "There are those who, once they cease to amaze us, cease to interest us." It is certainly comforting to believe that idle chatter serves the purpose of binding mankind with one another and maintaining healthy socialization, but one may assume that F.H. Bradley, for all his idealism, would not have approved of workplace gossip.

We all know how it begins. Over lunch, perhaps, or by the iconic water cooler, where it rapidly diffuses via osmosis. Gossip need not even be confined to the realm of conspiratorial whispering or vicious text messages; it can manifest in the odd jerk of the head or the sly wink. Suddenly they all know It. Kaitlin hates Christie for what she said to Jake, and Lateesha doesn't care what Brad thinks about Lisa's ex. Names and emotions swirl through the office, and the sterile workplace is suddenly pregnant with human drama.

Harmless? Not at all. F.H. Bradley and this author would agree that there is nothing worse for work productivity than gossip. Generally, the results can be felt within the hour. While there isn't an idiotproof way to avoid gossip (as the world keeps turning out better idiots), it may helpful to log away some quick advice on how to field the problems on the ground:

ANXIETY: It doesn't matter what causes it, but a single anxious employee is a lifesuck for the entire workforce. It adds to the level of tension and often creates the sort of feeling which authors tend to assure us can be cut with a knife. Gossip nearly always leads to anxiety.

Practical solution: Don't be a drama major. If someone tells you shocking information about Jack and Brianna, remember that you don't really need to LOOK so shocked. Refrain from gasping, bugging your eyes and dropping your jaw. The gossipmonger may be looking to elicit a reaction, but it isn't his constitutional right. No dramatic reaction might equal no continuity, which might hopefully equal no anxiety.

TRUST: How can Gerald ever trust Madison again after what she said about him? Trust issues are another immediate casualty of workplace gossip. Even those self-proclaimed team players will not demonstrate sportsmanship toward those who have been selling their secrets to the other team.

Practical solution: Be an adult. If it's you doing the secret-selling, apologize to the one you sold out. If it's you being betrayed, shoot Benedict Arnold an e-mail or wait for an appropriately private moment to deal with

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