The words flash up on your computer's message screen or they creep up over the wall of your cubicle. Or maybe you're just trying to enjoy a Cobb salad at lunch with a couple of co-workers when it strikes: Office Gossip.
You swear you're not going to get involved with the drama in your workplace, but let's face it, a juicy story is hard to resist. And if you know something no one else does, well then you're the center of attention with a secret screaming to be shared. But let's remember that this isn't high school and office gossip, while sinfully enjoyable at times, is more often annoying, counterproductive and at its worst, the kind of thing that can get you fired or sued.
If you're a manager, you're doubly challenged because office politics and scheming exists at the highest levels of any company, but you're tasked also with keeping those under you from letting gossip de-rail morale and hurt productivity. The business communications company Equisys researched office gossip in 2002 and found that, on average, 65 hours per year is wasted by employees gossiping about the workplace. Multiply 65 by the number of your employees and the grapevine can suddenly look like it's about to choke the life out of a workplace.
So here are some tips you can follow and pass along to those who work for you:
Newly hired? Stay neutral.
One of the biggest mistakes a new employee or manager can make is forging alliances without first understanding the existing office dynamic. The friendly guy who takes you to lunch and happily answers questions about office personnel and procedures, may be just the guy you want to keep at a distance, because all that eager help he's offering could mask an agenda to get you on "his side" in any office drama.
It's a shame, really, that you need to be a little suspicious of everyone, but in time your good judgment will help determine who can be confided in and who needs to stay an arm's length away.
Don't do anything that generates gossip.
This sounds obvious, but if you want to stay out of the gossip spotlight, don't get drunk at the office Christmas party, don't flirt with everyone (or worse, sleep around with your co-workers), dress appropriately, respect the workplace and yourself, and don't bring your personal life into the office. If you're going through a rough divorce, don't saddle your co-workers with every new detail. If you're hung over, don't brag about how much you drank the night before. This is an office, not a fraternity house or a therapy session.
If you catch a juicy piece of news, keep it to yourself.
Even with the best intentions to stay above the fray, you're likely to hear something that would make some of your co-workers' jaws drop. You heard Joe is going to get fired on Friday? Don't say a word to anyone. For one thing, Joe deserves to think that his firing wasn't making the rounds before he heard about it. And you don't want to seem like someone who finds pleasure in the unfortunate events others experience. There's really not a lot of room for schadenfreude at work.
If a supervisor trusts you with a key piece of information, he or she might be watching to see how professional you are as you carry that nugget around with you. Show your peers and your bosses that you can be trusted.
Use your computer and work e-mail for work only.
Just how much Big Brother-style monitoring of work e-mail and computer use goes on will vary dramatically from one workplace to another. But the mere fact that at any moment a supervisor and an IT guy can show up at your desk and uncover unsavory messages and images on your computer should be enough of a reason to play it safe. Most bosses understand that during the day, you may take a mental break once in awhile and check out eBay or do some non-work-related Web surfing, but keep it to a minimum and keep it clean. Too much nonsense on your computer will get people's tongues wagging and a series of e-mails could provide a trail for someone looking to sue the company, based on claims of harassment or unfavorable working conditions.
There's another reason, of course, to avoid e-mail gossip. Because you're thinking and writing about a particular person, you run the risk of absentmindedly putting that person's e-mail address in the "To:" line and hitting "Send" after you just trashed her outfit in three vicious sentences.
Know your audience.
This is especially true if you're new in the office. Your joke about the priest and the rabbi may be hilarious to you and plenty of others, but it might not sit well with a co-worker who keeps his faith quiet, but isn't afraid to let his supervisor know what's being said around him.
And even if you think you and your co-worker have become friends, keep an eye out for red flags, signs that this person may not be 100 percent trustworthy. If you catch her gossiping about someone who appears to be a friend, that's a huge sign that she may value the story more than the friendship. Also, if the person you're gossiping to spends a lot of time-either because of the work arrangements or some other reason-be aware that what you say may be passed along to someone you don't want as an audience.
Is a little gossip okay?
There is a wide swath of gray that complicates the office gossip topic. A 2008 Albright College study led by social psychologist Dr. Sally Farley, PhD, found that female gossipers were often perceived as having power and working within the hub of the workplace communications network. And a Rutgers University study, led by psychologist Herbert Strean, PhD, suggests that office gossip can be a bonding experience, allowing employees to share sentiments, vent a little, and strengthen the sense of teamwork in the office.
Further muddying the waters is the thin line between gossip and sharing important or helpful information. If a new hire, for example, appears to be struggling or feeling intimidated by the boss, there might be some value in sharing information that will help the new person understand office dynamics. You might be able to say, "Yeah, the boss yells a lot, but it's not personal and if you were ever in trouble, he would be the first person to help out" or something that is constructive, not shallow or insulting.
The bottom line is that office gossip is all but unavoidable. But you can sidestep the traps and minimize your involvement in what can turn an office into a soap opera before you've finished your first cup of coffee. And remember, it's the kind of thing your mom probably told you about high school, but it applies in the workplace as well: If people gossip TO you, they probably gossip ABOUT you.
So watch what you say and to whom you say it.