by David Furritus

Created on: November 09, 2008   Last Updated: December 03, 2008

Imagine a creature that lives only for the moment. Imagine a creature that has virtually no fear and insatiable curiosity. Imagine a creature that has no idea what the word 'moderation' is. Imagine 2-4 pounds of pure joy. Imagine all of these things and you will have the ferret: Nature's hedonists.

For thousands of years ferrets have been kept as pets by everyone from ancient Egyptians, Romans, and even British Monarchs. Most of the time they were kept around as working animals (pound for pound no other animal is a more vicious hunter), but another reason for their popularity must come from the fact that they can bring a smile to your face at any time of the day. From the moment that they wake up from their incredibly long naps, they're extremely active. When a ferret is allowed to run free, they'll bounce around maniacally doing what is often referred to as the "weasel war dance". No other animal (save other members of the weasel family) seem to take so much joy in simple moving. Their endless "poinging" and the noises they make are pure comedy. Zoologists have yet to figure out why they do this, other than the fact that they're simply happy.

When around other animals of any size they show no fear. Cats try to ignore them while dogs are easily confused by them. If they're really feeling active, they'll try and wrestle with their new playmates endlessly. The scary part is when a ferret is actually WINNING against something ten times its size. As they have no fear, they never fight defensively. They'll just grab onto something and try to flip them. Oddly enough, this behavior is similar to not only the way they hunt, but also mating rituals. Ferrets in the wild have been known to wrestle around for quite some time as a rather twisted kind of foreplay followed by lovemaking that can go into the hours. Since ferrets mate for life, some have hypothesized that they also feel true affection for their mates and kits.

Another way that ferrets always bring out a smile is watching them run headlong at extreme speeds. Because all ferrets are nearsighted, they tend to run into things very fast. In movies like "Along Came Polly" this behavior is often used for comic relief. Even though the movies usually use animatronics, the real animals do it all of the time and they usually stop, look around, and continue as if nothing happens.

Perhaps the funniest thing to see is a ferret when it's on a mission to get somewhere or steal something. Due to their nature as natural tunnelers, ferrets can get into the tightest spaces and honestly believe that if they can fit in a space, whatever their "prize" of the moment can fit as well. Imagine a two pound female ferret dragging a five pound onion across the floor and trying to sneak it into her "stash" and growing extremely frustrated when it doesn't fit. Now, that's comedy.

So, yes cats can look cute when playing string, and dogs can look smart as they're displaying their complete lack of intelligence, but no pet can hold a candle to the true masters of comedy: The Ferret.

Learn more about this author, David Furritus.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.