by William Guilmette

Created on: November 07, 2008   Last Updated: November 20, 2008

Parents like to believe they have an influence on their children's upbringing more than anyone or anything else. This is partly true during the infant, child, and pre-teen stages of your child's life. As a parent, you have control over what the child eats, or wears during the day. Parents also control daily activities, and the development of the child's social structure.

During the early developmental years, parent's influences provide guidance, safety, and support against the world unknown to the child. At this stage in life, the child's brain and thought processes have not developed enough to make these decisions rationally. At some point in the development, however, a time comes when the child begins to think and have his or her own feelings. This usually occurs during the late child/adolescent years and into the pre-teen/early teen years. They begin questioning things, forming their own opinions and views, and creating their own social environments.

The early teen years mark a frightening, yet important stage in the child's development. Parents are no longer the main sources of influence. Humans are social creatures and have a strong need to belong to social groups. The social system the teen has developed becomes the main source of influence. In an attempt to belong to the social system, the teen will identify with and generally accept the views of the group. Parents may notice a change in clothing styles, different speech patterns and phrases that may not have been heard in the past, and a general change in the attitude of the teen. The teen may challenge the parent's demands more often, and at times, even revolt or rebel. These actions are natural phenomenon that most children go through in an attempt to gain self-identity.

Parents need to be aware of more that just the social influences. The second most influential factor during the early teen years is modern technology. Technology may begin to influence the child even before the social system does. The development of video games has changed the world. Adolescents and teens get so involved in the games they begin to take on the role of the characters. The programs on television influence children in ways you never thought would be possible. The violence, sex, hate, and racism on many of the programs is absorbed by viewers. Even cartoons expose the children to negative social norms and values. (This is not implying that all television shows have negative effects on children. There are several good, positive programs for children and teens.)

Enjoy the time you have to nurture and influence your children. The early stages of development are extremely critical. Be aware, however, that a time will come when you will no longer be the main influence on the child. Social systems and groups are powerful, yet extremely important to teens. Similarly, technology will continue to grow and influence our children.

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