by Aylah Hollis

Created on: November 07, 2008

The differences between "good" and "toxic" friends is really in the way they are with you. Lets start with the "toxic" type first-since that seems to be the the real challange for most people. Toxic friendships seem to eat you from the inside, for lack of a better example...

The word 'toxic' means - to have a chemical nature that is harmful to health or is lethal if consumed or entering the body through other methods.../poisonous. Alot of our friends are really just that -poisonous and very harmful to our health in the ways that they can and do tend to drain every reserve of energy from you- by constantly 'wanting' and 'needing'- and always dumping their bad choices on your shoulders, with the expectations of you being or having the answer to make right their problems. Friends like that never take into consideration that they have weighed you down with the results of their poor choices. Now certainly, everyone needs a shoulder to cry on, but these people just want both shoulders and then one more for good measure.

Toxic friends cause you to feel bad and question yourself and your choices. Guilt is a big factor in having a toxic friend. They have all the knowledge of you and what makes you tick and they prey on that, using your weeknesses against you - while all the while acting to be your closest, using past experiences or situations to corral you and keep you doing for them.

I do believe that some of our toxic friends are made by ourselves - through our allowance of certain habits and behaviors that we over look, for one reason or another... and eventually they come to 'expect' your envolvment without second thought. They take your strength and never give any support back to you , when you need it. It seems that these same people never have the answers you need or can offer that help that you may need, or even seem to have the time to try - or to even listen, and just be that shoulder. Toxic friends tend to leave you with the feeling of dred when they come around and reliefe when they go.

Now on the other hand, you have the "good friends". 'Good friends' are the people that you can really count on to be on yourside, to the same degree that you put forth. They are in your corner- whether you are right or wrong. A true 'good friends' priorities are different and they seem to be more concerned with your well being and making sure that you are alright. That is also the key to being a good friend- caring more about your friends need than your own. And if everyone practiced that method of friendship. we would all be better people and in turn - the world would be better .

Good friends -not only give you the support you need, but they also encourage you to do better in your life, and as a person. Good friends cause you to want to be a better person, and they help you to grow.

Good friends are like sunlight to flowers - the light shines on them - giving them the warmth and the nuetrients that it needs to grow and become its most beautiful... Toxic friends are like planting flowers in side a closed in box - its dark and cold, with no room to grow and very much mal-nuetritioned.

Hopefully we will one day get this concept right amungst each other. People have unlimited potential in this world when they have good support systems...

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