by Lyndsay Andrews

Created on: November 06, 2008   Last Updated: December 03, 2008

The world felt numb as she sat in her chair staring at the piece of paper. The words blurred as she thought back on the recent conversation she'd had with him. He said he was sorry, yet she knew he said it because it was the first thing that had come to his mind. He wasn't truly sorry, just upset he got caught in an act of stupidity.

Her eyes were tired from the inability to sleep all week. As the bell rang, she looked up to see the rest of the students slowly file into the chemistry classroom. Her stomach felt empty, like it was placed in her throat by accident. Where was the happy ending she was hoping for?

As the last person came in, Sidda looked back at the paper. It seemed like centuries ago that she had done the homework. She was a different person now. Changed by trusting someone and having them step on it like a piece of trash. The idea would always be in her head that it was never truly worth it.

As Mrs. Pearson begins class, she drifts off to a place nobody can touch. A wave of pity falls over her as she realizes that it is truly over between her and Eli. After all the things he put her through, this was the last straw. Her final link that ended all of the unhappiness. Then why did she feel so alone? As the paper and desk become one, she smiles at herself, realizing that the teacher's voice is like a scene from Charlie Brown. No need to worry, she wouldn't be able to understand or recall any of it if she tried.

Closing her eyes and inhaling deeply, Sidda smells a hint of his cologne still on his sweatshirt. Flashbacks of secret jokes and stolen kisses fill her, clouding her eyes over with tears. His voice rang loudly as he'd said, "Sidda, I don't know what happened. One second I was with Mark and the next I was talking to this girl. I'm so sorry baby. Please forgive me. I never meant to hurt you."

Wiping away the tears streaming down her cheeks, she opens her eyes back up to the paper. Calculations about molarity in gases fill her view, but don't comprehend with the thoughts in her head. The voice that screams 'it's only a dream.' None of this can be real.

Hearing the door open, Sidda glances up. As Jason walks in he glances her way and pauses, apparently noticing the tear streaks on her face. Looking at Mrs. Pearson, he grabs a seat and immediately removes a sheet of paper.

Sidda looks forward again, allowing the scratching of pen on paper to drown out the screams in her head. She and Eli had been together for a year and a half. They knew each other

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