by Rebecca Mccranie

Created on: November 06, 2008

The question is not whether a woman should seek the consent of her husband before having an abortion, the question is whether that consent should be required. Yes, absolutely, a woman should discuss the decision to terminate a pregnancy with the father before doing so, provided that the act of conception was consensual. This is particularly true for married women; taking wedding vows means binding your life to someone else's, and major decisions of this sort should be made together.

I say "should," and I say "discuss." It is the responsible thing to do, to consider the father's opinion. However, the final decision is the pregnant woman's. To legally require the spouse's consent is to further the retraction of a woman's right to choose whether or not to terminate her pregnancy. It gives the husband legal rights to his wife's womb. Should a wife be able to court order her husband's vasectomy, or bar him from having one? The decision to procreate is intense, it is personal, and, while disagreements over reproduction may lead to marital conflict or even divorce, it is ludicrous to suggest that government has any place in this discussion. We should seek open, honest communication and compromise with our spouse, and strive for the kind of marital bond that does not need the courts to regulate our interactions.

I realize that the difference between barring a man's vasectomy and denying a woman an abortion is that in the latter case, conception has already occurred. I understand that, for many, the question is about parental rights as much as it is about reproductive rights. I believe that fathers' rights are often overlooked in the legal system. There is no perfect solution. Until we can remove a fetus from a woman's womb and bring the baby to term by other means, requiring spousal consent grants husbands a measure of control over their wives' bodies that seems to disregard the individuality, the equality, and even the humanity of women. No matter how badly a man may want a child, he has no right to impose that wish on his partner, married or not. While biology may not be on his side, there are other ways to have a child. We, women and men, have proven ourselves more than the sum of our biological components.

Women have not always been allowed control over their own bodies. Not that long ago, the idea of "marital rape" was almost an oxymoron, as it was understood that a husband had the right to demand sex from his wife as the mood took him. In many cultures this is still true. What has been gained in this country, namely, the legal right to decide when and with whom to have a child, and to determine, for ourselves, what happens to our bodies, should not be given up lightly. We should defend the sanctity of our privacy and of our right to choose, both for ourselves and for our daughters. Requiring spousal consent prior to a married woman's abortion puts a chink in those defenses and begins the process of whittling away at these rights.

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