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My grandmother was what would have been termed scandalous in her day. She dared to buck the norm and divorced my grandfather, became a single mother with my father and worked a job, now remember this was back in the 1920's -30's and these were not things that proper women did. Thus is the way that her life went she tossed her head in defiance when she was told that she should not do something and went on and usually did it.

She was a bigger then life woman, believed in living life to the fullest and not spending it unhappy, she did what she had to do, she had a wild heart and a free spirit as I came to know my grandmother I learned to appreciate these aspects of her, even envying her to some extent. My grandmother was the black sheep of her family and a rebel. I felt a kinship with her and wish that I had had the ability to get to know her at a much younger age.

As it was I didn't even meet my grandmother until I was at the tender age of 13. She was getting up in age and could no longer live on her own, too many falls, too many incidents, a dirty house that she could care less about, no longer able to drive safely. So the wheels were set in motion and my parents moved her down to where we lived so that they could keep a better eye on her. She refused to live with us, however, so arrangements were made for her to live in a nice little retirement community about a mile from where we lived. I remember how anxious I was to meet this lady who was my father's mother. How jolly she was. She just fit the whole definition of jolly right down to her rather large frame I flet immediately at ease with her, I felt like I had known her all my life and she understood me.

Through my high school years I got to know this wonderful women and loved sitting in her little home talking to her about the things she did as a girl and a young woman, all the trouble she caused, and the rules that she broke and she seemed rather pleased with herself for her rebelliousness and I was as well.

I remember going over to her house one afternoon for a visit. I had just broken up with a boy, and the same day had learned that I had gotten a rather nice job...nice for a high school student anyway. Not the usual fast food drone, I managed to get a part-time position with the local newspaper assisting the circulation manager. But that somehow seemed diminished in the face of losing, who I thought was, THE boy for me. I walked in shoulders hunched over, eyes red from crying and my grandmother looked at

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