by Stephen Sloane

Created on: November 06, 2008   Last Updated: February 06, 2011

The Godparent's Quandary: Which Rules To Use?

Back in the early summer, my wife informed me that friends of ours had graciously asked if we would do them the honor of being Godparents to Tyler, their newborn bundle of joy. What does one say in such circumstances, I thought to myself, other than a hearty and resounding, "We'd be honored?" In a jovial tone, I told my wife to accept. It wasn't until lying wide awake that night in the small hours that I started pondering over what, exactly, we had signed up for.

After all, what is a Godparent? Aren't they sage-like figures, wrinkled and well advanced in years, that come out of the shadows every now and again to offer encouragement, direction and pearls of wisdom, before fluttering back to the far reaches of a Godchild's periphery? Perhaps Godmothers equip themselves with wings and wands, saying on occasion things like "spit-spot," or "less is more," while Godfathers busy themselves "taking care" of shady and unsavory characters, whilst speaking in thick Sicilian accent. I don't quite see myself in any of these guises I'm not even sure that while still in my late thirties, I'm legally old enough to hold a Godparenting position (do you get a tax break being a Godparent?). Perhaps, then, the God-parenting job description is something all new Godparents hold the liberty to write, themselves. How about starting off with the traditional birthday and Christmas card perhaps accompanied with a present? Maybe an occasional phone call or E-mail, to see how things are going. Then, when the child reaches eighteen, offer a firm handshake, an encouraging pat on the back, and slip under their arm a signed leather-bound copy of The Book of Virtues.

Perhaps my confusion of God-parenting responsibility comes from the rather distanced relationship I had with my own Godparents. If memory serves, they would make the occasional phone call, accompanied with well, birthday and Christmas cards. Maybe what I need is an ideal God-parenting role model that I can emulate in both the Sound Guidance and Ageless Wisdom departments. But who would one consider to be the epitome of the ideal Godparent? Given free choice and unlimited funds, I'd have to say I'd personally opt for Yoda. He's really old and wise beyond his years, isn't physically imposing so you wouldn't feel forced into taking his advice, he's kind of cuddly when you need a shoulder to cry on, and he's well-versed in respecting personal space he pops up only on the odd occasion when

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