by Barbara Leech

Created on: November 04, 2008

In the October 24, 2000 issue of Woman's World, I told my story of being the mother of a young child with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). I had battled with the chemical imbalance disorder in my own adolescence, so I recognized the signs in my youngest daughter, Courtney, when she entered first grade. But Courtney developed OCD much earlier and much more severe than I ever did. What followed was a long road of behavior therapy and trials of several different medications until we finally found a degree of normalcy in our lives.

When I first told my story to readers in October of 2000, Courtney, about to turn 11 years old, had begun to turn the corner to recovery, having found the right doctor, the right medications and a lot of support in dealing with the affects of the disorder. OCD causes unwanted thoughts, even panic, about everyday activities. Some sufferers feel they must do certain tasks over and over again or a feeling of impending doom overtakes them. The worst part is those with OCD know that these unwanted thoughts and worries and not rational, but they can not make them stop. For a young child it is impossible for them to understand what is happening to them.

Prior to her gaining control over her disorder, Courtney would take hours to prepare for bed because her sheets had to be "just right". She could not get dressed easily because her clothes just never felt right. Tags left inside her clothes would send her into a fit of tears. She went barefoot whenever possible because shoes never felt comfortable. She washed her hands over and over but could not explain why. Everyday things would send her into a tantrum of panic and despair and she was too young to understand it was OCD causing it.

Often at bedtime she would cry in my arms asking me why she had this and why I could not make it go away. She lost friends over her irrational behaviors and she missed out on things like Halloween parades at school and cheerleading all because she could not get herself to wear the costume or uniform. She prayed each night for help. Help came after years of searching. It took several different attempts, but we finally found the right combination of medication to regulate her OCD.

Courtney is now in college, having graduated high school one year early. Had anyone told me this scenario eight years ago, I would not have believed it. Her school years were difficult. As she grew her medications would stop working. When puberty hit there was constant turmoil trying to find the right balance of medications and with me trying understanding what was normal pre-teen issues and what was OCD. I spent many hours in doctors offices, I got to know every school nurse so well we practically became friends. Nothing was easy.

Courtney is about to turn 18, and though she still has some mild symptoms she understands what it is and how to get herself back in control. It was perseverance, faith and our love that got us through the difficult years of searching for answers and a medical solution.

For all that she has endured and all she has achieved, I am so very proud of my daughter. We do not always agree, but she has overcome so much and is on her way to a bright future. For any parent of a child with OCD, I hope you never give up. Challenges and symptoms will resurface just when you think they are under control. But in the end, you may have a very strong young adult standing in front of you, proving that every difficulty was worth it in the end.

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