by Lauren Albright

Created on: November 02, 2008

I am adopted. From as far back as I can remember I've always known that I was adopted. My adoptive parents, who I consider to be my real parents, told me at a very early age that I was "special" and that God gave me to them. I actually cannot even remember being told that I was adopted. It was one of those things that just was, like the grass being green, or the sky being blue. It was never something that our family hid from society; they were so happy to have a child to love and I loved my family. Even so, I often wondered why I was given up for adoption. I longed to know where I came from, if I had any brothers or sisters, did I look like any of my relatives?

At one point in time during my teenage years I approached my mother about searching for my biological family. She expressed her understanding of my feelings, but made it clear that both she and my father would rather I wait until I turned 18 to begin that search. I greatly loved and appreciated my parents so that is what I did. When I finally did turn 18 I began my search. After searching many different avenues I was reunited with my biological family after only a few, but very long, months. Not only did I find my birth mother and birth father, but one full sister, two full brothers and an extended family to boot. All my questions as to why I had been given up for adoption were answered. My birth mother was a teenager when she gave birth to me and already had a one and a half year old to take care of. She was in no position to care for another baby, so I was given up for adoption.

I am extremely grateful that I was reunited with my biological family. Many questions have been answered and I feel complete now, having that knowledge of where I come from. I have some friends who were adopted that have no desire to search for their family, but for me it was something that I had to do. I believe that every person has a right to know where they come from. That being said, my adoptive parents were very wise in guiding me to wait until I was 18 to search for my biological family. Meeting them brought on many emotions that I would not have been ready to deal with, or even handle, at a younger age. The end result of my search was a very positive one, my biological family was happy that I had found them. Still, it was a very emotionally taxing process and even now, seven years after meeting my biological family, there are still emotions to work through, like figuring out how they now fit into my life when I already have a mother and a father. You can't assume that every search for a biological family will end up that way and a negative result would bring upon even more emotions that a minor child is not ready to deal with. While every adoptive child has the right to search for their biological family, and should if they feel the need and/or desire, I believe it would be in their best interest to wait until reaching adulthood.

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