by J. G. Chalfant-Popp

Created on: October 30, 2008

You are sitting in the Emergency Room with three cracked ribs, a broken nose and a police officer is asking if you want to press charges. You find a red-satin g-string hanging over your child's car seat, the day after he insisted on taking your SUV to work. Your bank sends you a text message that your account has been closed the same day you deposited your paycheck and your spouse has been gone for week. Yep, it's over.

Abuse, infidelity and money. The three major ingredients for a "knock 'em out, go for the juggular, get all you can," Summary of Disillusionment. Dillusionment? (Oh please, what chemically imbalanced lawyer came up with this term?) I can just hear that poor soul in the Emergency Room, "I'm so disillusioned by my partner's less than perfect behavior. Maybe if I had bought a g-sting, none of this would have happened."

Disillusioned? Then what part of the illusion don't we get?

Maybe that's the issue here. How many of us walk into a relationship, with the illlusion that we'll live "happily ever after" the day we say, I do? What were the red flags we ignored prior to that $20,000.00 ritual we called a wedding? Did your partner have a prior record for assault and battery, that you ignored because he insisted it wasn't his fault? Did you perceive her flirtatious behavior as just being overly friendly? When you were dating, did you dearly beloved take "breathers" from your relationship and then surprise you with a gift that would exceed Donald Trump's annual salary? Then is it any wonder that you're sitting with two attorneys and an enraged spouse fighting over who gets the dog and an autographed picture of Larry the Cable Guy?

Let us go back and look at what we are really dealing with. Pre-marital baggage.

Pre-marital baggage can range from a finicky eater to a murderer out on parole. The list is endless and when dealing with matters of the heart, we choose to ignore them.The baggage we bring into a relationship is usually shoved into a closet when we fall hopelessly in love and are at our best to impress our special someone. But after the honeymoon is over and the stress of day to day living begins, that baggage could fit a FED-X cargo plane and three UPS trucks. Opening up those bags could have Pandora's Box consequences and determine the life expectancy of the marriage. By carefully sorting out each issue, a marriage might be saved through counseling and a strong desire to stay together. But when the bags are thrown open and the contents begin to stink

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