by Jeffrey A. Moore

Created on: October 24, 2008   Last Updated: July 12, 2009

There are many words to describe a pushover parent in the English vocabulary. But words turned into actions such as soft, easy-going, carefree, friendly, and kind-hearted can often lead to becoming a pushover parent. If you find that your relationship with your child falls into one of those categories it is probable that you are on the verge of pushover parenthood yourself.

Being a pushover parent isn't necessarily a bad thing. Just being a pushover parent in excess is. Children need to be told no every once in a while just to prove a point. My kids like to cry out, "That's not fair" when they don't get their way. My favorite response to that is, "Well, life's not fair, so you better get used to it." This always makes them stop and think, at least for a moment.

Remembering to be a parent and not a best friend can sometimes be difficult, but it is very important to be able to distinguish between the two. Being a product of the 80's, my children actually consider me to be a cool parent at times. We share a lot of the same favorites such as music tastes, video games, and movies. I have been known to give in to that sad, puppy dog look on occasion, but all my children know that when I have had enough, it is time to back off. This comes from defining a line and not crossing it. It is OK to be cool as long as you are stern when it is required.

Every person has their own parenting style and that is a good thing, too. That is what makes us individuals and not clones, this shaping of our parents beliefs. Every parent thinks their child can do no wrong and it must have been Jane or John Doe's fault when an incident arises. It will better serve every parent to realize that every child will err in their ways. They are human after all. Not giving in to a child bawling at a store over some candy will better prepare them for the reality that not everything is given to them. They will greatly respect you for that once they have grown up, which will come sooner than the average parent might realize.

Sure signs of being a pushover parent are:

* Giving in to every little thing

* Always defending your child

* Being a personal waiter

* Never disciplining your child

* Trying to talk things through instead of being firm and saying NO

These are some sure fire signs of pushover parenting. You might find yourself feeling better now because you didn't hurt their feelings, but when your baby becomes an adult you will not enjoy being a pushover parent then. So don't be a pushover!

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