by Collin Reed

Created on: October 24, 2008   Last Updated: October 31, 2008

An American in Paris

I had a complete meltdown yesterday - with lots of tears. With Gary here, I'm reminded of my real life - the one I'm going back to in a week - and it makes me a little melancholy.

I can't explain why I feel the way I do. I love him - the kids - our life together - but at the same time I feel dead inside (not because of Gary or the kids - but because of my own strange wiring). Here, the dead part of me was awakened. I need to find a way to have both at the same time.

Gary and I talked a lot about it. He gets it - he's the same way. His happiness isn't in Paris - but he gets why mine is. We talked about my coming back each year - maybe not so extravagantly (says I), but the thought did appease me very much. I know, I'm the luckiest girl in the world to have him for a husband; believe me, I am grateful every single day.

Aside from my personal drama - we did a lot yesterday. I took him on the Louvre-to-Arc-walk and we taxied back to Saint Germain for a lovely lunch at what I've decided is my favorite place to just 'be' - L'heure Gourmande. It was Gary who wanted to try it out because the guy that owns our apartment, Thierry, recommended it for their hot chocolate.

It's tucked away in the semi-hidden Passage Dauphine (almost right next to the Franprix). So - down this passage are a couple of shops and this sweet (quiet!) little bistro. The tuna salad I had was delish and the desserts were decadent beyond words. After lunch and a quick trip to the Franprix for groceries, we took a two-hour nap.

After rousing from some much needed sleep, I took him to the tip of Ile de la Cite for a little foot dangling over the Seine. Then we meandered up along the right bank up toward Notre Dame where we found some cute souvenirs for our peeps back home. We missed the last entry time for the church by five minutes so we went around to the back of the church to see the cute little park - which was dotted with lovers, children and tourists.

Then we came back to the apartment, packed a little cheese-cracker-wine picnic and went to the Tuileries - where we had hoped to see the Eiffel lights come on at 9:00. They didn't come on at 9:00 but maybe, since it's staying lighter in the evening now, they've changed it to 10:00. We packed up and made our way back to the apartment via Pont des Arts - which was positively crammed with picnicking locals. What a life...

I think we'll go back there tonight to watch the Eiffel lights...

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