by Kristina Lasher

Created on: October 24, 2008   Last Updated: October 30, 2008

Most people can think back to when the red flags went up in their relationship. The problem is, most people decide when these moments were after the relationship is already over. What most people don't understand is relationships are work. We grow up thinking we are going to fall in love, get married, have children and live happily ever after! It is easier in todays world to walk away from our relationship, than to actually put the work in to save it. Families are being torn apart everyday from people not paying attention to the signals that their relationship needs more attention.

Firstly, lack of communication is the largest, and brightest red flag! A couple that is not including each other in their lives is on a fast path of destruction. Some people claim that they get along better not getting to involved into each other's business, but that is the first sign that they are no longer on the same page. Five minutes a day to discuss the highlights of the past day is all that is truly needed to show that there is still care and attention still available.

Even though most people don't want to admit it, but a barren sex life is another red flag in a relationship. Once a new relationship becomes a sexual relationship most people are eager to have it as much as possible. Soon after that fades away, but the key is to find new and exciting ways to keep each other interested. When a relationships sex life fades away it usually ends with one of the parties being unfaithfulto the other which is more painful, than taking the fifteen minutes to please each other. It is not always because they missed the sex, which has been proved to be a human need...not just a want! Most people are looking for the companionship that they are missing in their current relationship.

Financial stress causing constant arguing is another red flag in a relationship. It is natural for people to argue over what they do not have. What makes this a red flag is how often these arguments occur. The reason finacial stress becomes a red flag is how the blame is being placed during the argument. Being sad or disappointed about a current financial state is natural, and is usually mutual. When blame is being placed on one person whether it is merited or not puts extra strain on a relationship. Once a person feels the burden of being the cause of financialstress leaves them to feel unworthy of the love and affection of their family. Understanding that financial stress occurs in all families, and needs to be dealt with as a family is the first step to making a painful problem help heal your relationship.

The most important step is to try to acknowledge some of these flags before your relationship is so damaged that even being in the same room is too much to bare! Some people find counseling helps. Others find that taking an active role in working on their relationship personally brings them closer together. Working with your significant other is the only way to save your relationship. No one will be able to put you on the right path unless you are willing to walk down it yourself. There are days that you wont want to be around your significant other, but the days that you are reminded of why you love them in the first place is what truly makes being in love special. Good Luck, and Happy Loving!

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